WEBVTT

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(gentle music)

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Welcome to Hadley Presents.

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I'm your host, Ricky Enger, inviting you to sit back, relax,

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and enjoy a conversation with the expert.

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In this episode, support group leaders Judy Davis

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and Lynndah Lahey, our joined by Director of Community

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Marc Arneson to discuss low vision support groups.

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I am so glad you guys could join us.

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It's always really, really fun to have

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kind of a panel discussion

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because we are getting the viewpoints

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of not just a couple of people.

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We actually have four of us in the room.

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So I think it's gonna be a great time.

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Before we get into talking about what each of you does

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with your support groups and just how important

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those things are, let's do a little intro

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and find out a bit about each of you.

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Let's start with you, Lynndah.

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Sure. Happy to.

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Bottom line is I have quite a varied background.

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I knew nothing about low vision, low vision support groups,

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or anything like that when I joined Wheeling Township.

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So this is the smallest portion of my job

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in terms of responsibility here.

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The township is a small form of local government.

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Marc knows firsthand that it is the single most favorite

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thing that I do.

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My background is varied.

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I spent many years in communications, marketing, and sales.

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Took some time off living out of the country.

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And then when I came back, decided that I wanted

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to start a new chapter in my life

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and went the nonprofit route where I was an executive

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director for a nonprofit,

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and then came here and joined as the director

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of Senior and Disability Services.

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On the first day I started, they told me that,

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"Oh, by the way, you have to run a a support group."

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And I said, "Great, what's that?"

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And they said, "It's called VIP.

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It's the VIP Low Vision Support Group."

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So I literally kind of got dropped in head first.

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And here we are five years almost to the day that I started.

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Awesome. And how about you, Judy?

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I actually have retinitis pigmentosa.

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And I was diagnosed at a fairly young age,

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but it wasn't till I was in my twenties

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when I moved from my familiar area in Indiana

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out to Pennsylvania that I realized how much I was relying

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on familiarity to get around rather than my vision.

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So luckily I found out pretty quickly

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that there was a support group in that town.

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I started attending the meetings, and I kind of got involved

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with it in that kind of progressive way that you do

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sometimes with organizations you get involved with.

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You know, I started making phone calls to members

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to tell them about the meetings,

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and then I started arranging transportation,

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and then I started doing program directing.

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It just kind of built from there.

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I was in a situation where I moved.

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So I've actually lived in four different states.

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So I've been involved with different support groups.

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And so I think that has introduced me to different goals

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of different groups, and I've learned the good

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and the bad from those groups.

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So I think that has really influenced

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how the support group here is run.

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My education is actually in library science,

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so I'm one of those organized, detailed people.

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So I think that helped, for me, you know,

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having vision loss myself,

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that first support group I got involved with, you know,

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it just changed my life.

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Being with other people with vision loss,

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that is just so key when you're on your vision loss journey.

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Yes. Just having somebody who's been there

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and knows what it's like, or is going through that

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at the same time as you.

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I think you're right, it's incredibly important.

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Marc, as part of your job, you actually get to interface

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with a lot of these support groups.

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Why don't you just start by talking a little bit about that

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and then just head right into your questions,

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'cause I know you've got a lot.

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And this conversation is going to be so informative

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and so important, so I'm looking forward to it.

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So, as you mentioned, my title here

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is Director of Community, and I always like to share

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that I think I have the coolest job in the world.

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What I get to do is just be a part of these different groups

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and just share about Hadley and things that we're doing,

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and just do a lot of listening and understand other ways

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that Hadley can be even more helpful.

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And I've had the pleasure of firsthand being a part

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of both of these groups, Lynndah and Judy's groups.

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And I am curious, can you tell me

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just a little bit about your groups?

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Maybe the number of people that have joined them,

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how often you guys meet, what that typically looks like

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each time you guys meet?

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This is Lynndah.

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Unlike Judy, I don't have any vision loss.

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What I find really interesting about this group,

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my group in specific, we have about 45 members.

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When I joined, I started here in 2016.

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The group itself was founded in the year 2000,

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sort of organically, much like Ricky's probably started,

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where someone in the community raised a need

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to someone here in this local government office.

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And I'm not quite sure exactly how it started, but it did.

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And it's been going continuously, continuously.

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So obviously into its 21st year, which is really exciting.

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The group hovered around 20 or so for many years.

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People came and went and so forth,

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but there are a few core members who have been in the group

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for well over a decade.

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And that, in and of itself, helps.

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What I specifically find so interesting about our group is,

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first of all a large group.

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I love the fact that it is so varied.

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I've got group members from the age of 40 to the age of 95.

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I've got group members who were born blind

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and group members who were just diagnosed last week

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with maybe macular or glaucoma.

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Several people who use guide dogs,

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several people who use canes,

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several people who are still driving,

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several people who live well out of the township

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and therefore use ADA transportation to get here.

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I mean, it's so varied.

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Everything again, from congenital blindness,

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to Stargardt's, to all kinds of stuff.

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So a really interesting, varied group.

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And for me as this leader who stepped into the role,

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I find that especially intriguing for me.

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Everybody's needs in this group are very different.

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I've come to rely on a few people in the group

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who just have that knack, that knack of being very welcoming

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or being really attuned to someone new joining the group.

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If somebody new is coming to the group,

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I will call that person in advance and say,

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"Oh, you know, somebody new's gonna join."

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Back in the days pre-COVID,

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when we could see people together, I would say,

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"I'm gonna put this new lady next to you.

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You know, kind of introduce her

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to the other people at the table."

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So I've kind of worked the crowd, so to speak,

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to try and get to know certain people.

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Obviously we're not meeting in person.

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We've gone to all Zoom meetings.

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The thing that I also find really interesting

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about our group is that not only does it include people

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with visual impairment, but in many cases their spouse,

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or their sibling, or the next door neighbor also attends.

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And I've really had fun with that, too.

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So that makes our group, I think, particularly interesting.

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It's very varied.

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This is Judy, and makeup-wise

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we're very similar to Lynndah's.

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You know, the age range is the same,

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the vision loss range is the same.

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Our group is older as far as length and time in existence.

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If I had to guess, it probably started in like 1990 or so.

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And it started out connected with a low vision center.

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I joined into it when I moved here in '98 in North Carolina.

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And again, I kind of did what I did

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when I was living in Pennsylvania.

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I started at one level, and then eventually

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I got a job at the low vision center,

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so then I ended up co-facilitating it.

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And then, when the low vision center closed,

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it's all very volunteer-oriented now

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as far as who's helping with it.

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If I had to guess, we probably have

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between 40 and 50 members.

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And when we met in person, we probably had

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between 20 and 22 attending.

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Now that we're meeting over the Zoom platform

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during the Coronavirus, we're probably averaging about 18.

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And the reason for that number discrepancy is,

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I don't know how Lynndah does it in her group,

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but we have callers that call our members

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and tell them what the meeting topic is.

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And again, pre-COVID we would find out if they needed a ride

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and to see if we could help them with transportation.

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Many of our people never actually make it to the meeting.

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Just that relationship between the caller and that person

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is all that person wants or needs, I guess.

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But then we do have a significant number

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that people that come in.

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The way our meetings run, as far as a plan goes,

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is the first 10 or 15 minutes are social time.

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And it was really great when we could meet in person,

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'cause we had homemade cookies and we had coffee,

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and we had drinks and yeah, that just makes that interaction

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so much easier, especially for the newer people

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to have that time.

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And then the next 10 or 15 minutes it's myself.

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And then here in North Carolina, they have a social worker

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for the blind and our county is very blessed

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with the person we have.

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And so she and I take turns making announcements

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and we both co-facilitate, which I think really helps

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to have two of us working with it as well.

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I've actually had the pleasure

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of being in person in Lynndah's group, Judy.

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I haven't been, from a distance with the pandemic,

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but you know, the interesting thing is,

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as part of my role, I do get to visit a lot

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of different groups and share about Hadley,

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and I do hear about the challenges

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of keeping people engaged, especially when you're online,

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and you're using Zoom, and things like that.

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But it seems like you guys have been able

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to kind of keep a group consistent

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and people engaged and meeting together.

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Is there a secret to that?

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Like, what is it that you do to help

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really kind of engage your group?

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Judy, if you wanna go ahead and share first.

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I think part of it is 'cause we were such

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a well-established group that most people

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were able to transition in to doing it by phone.

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I mean, we did lose people because of the technology

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that's involved, which is sad.

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But I think also we do still have that social time.

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We have now gotten into more game playing

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since we went COVID, I think we've played games like

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two or three different times, maybe?

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We've come up with some really good ways

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to play games over our meetings and just,

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I know one of our members said,

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"All those endorphins from all of us laughing

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and just having so much fun together,

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just really made a difference."

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I think Judy and I are very similar in probably

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how we lead our groups.

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How I approach the group is very similar to Judy's in that,

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to me, my goal with this group is to be as positive,

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as uplifting, and let's have fun.

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You know, so we've kind of got this really great

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rapport going on.

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Like Judy, pre-COVID, we were meeting in person.

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And yes, the socialization was great,

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following a basic format, almost identical to Judy's.

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Socialization, announcements.

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I always used to have a speaker when we were meeting

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in person, and then kind of follow up

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with sort of something funny or poignant at the end.

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What's interesting for my group is that we generally

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always had about 35 in person when we were meeting.

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I'm delighted that I'm still getting anywhere from 22

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to about 27 on the Zoom calls every time.

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The very first couple were really tough

258
00:11:38.670 --> 00:11:41.010
because we were all struggling, me included,

259
00:11:41.010 --> 00:11:43.170
trying to figure out where the mute button was,

260
00:11:43.170 --> 00:11:44.700
how to get the camera in the right place.

261
00:11:44.700 --> 00:11:47.880
And now we are all just doing so well.

262
00:11:47.880 --> 00:11:50.010
But what I will say, I had three or four people

263
00:11:50.010 --> 00:11:52.860
in the group who just, "I don't wanna be on camera,

264
00:11:52.860 --> 00:11:54.780
I'm uncomfortable being on camera."

265
00:11:54.780 --> 00:11:57.150
And so I worked with each of them individually

266
00:11:57.150 --> 00:11:58.980
to let them know they could just pick up

267
00:11:58.980 --> 00:12:01.620
their landline and call in on the phone,

268
00:12:01.620 --> 00:12:04.380
so it would be just like talking to a friend.

269
00:12:04.380 --> 00:12:06.450
I've gotten to know each person, gotten to know

270
00:12:06.450 --> 00:12:08.820
kind of their strong points, their weak points.

271
00:12:08.820 --> 00:12:12.240
And for those that are uncomfortable being called on,

272
00:12:12.240 --> 00:12:14.580
so to speak, when we go around the room,

273
00:12:14.580 --> 00:12:16.830
I already know that they're not gonna wanna share.

274
00:12:16.830 --> 00:12:19.950
So I'll just say, "Oh, I can see Suzanne, you're here.

275
00:12:19.950 --> 00:12:21.780
I know you didn't really wanna join in today,

276
00:12:21.780 --> 00:12:24.960
but you know, don't forget to raise your hand or interrupt

277
00:12:24.960 --> 00:12:26.490
if there's something that you'd like to say."

278
00:12:26.490 --> 00:12:30.870
And so much of it is that knowing each person individually,

279
00:12:30.870 --> 00:12:32.790
but being really open to it.

280
00:12:32.790 --> 00:12:37.790
So much of it comes down to the personality of the leader.

281
00:12:38.160 --> 00:12:40.770
I have so many responsibilities in this job here

282
00:12:40.770 --> 00:12:41.880
that I do for the township.

283
00:12:41.880 --> 00:12:44.250
This is literally the smallest part of my job.

284
00:12:44.250 --> 00:12:46.680
It's the thing that I'm happiest to spend the most amount.

285
00:12:46.680 --> 00:12:50.820
I spend as much time as I can on it because it is a direct

286
00:12:50.820 --> 00:12:53.460
level of service back to the community.

287
00:12:53.460 --> 00:12:56.340
And it allows me to kind of give back in ways

288
00:12:56.340 --> 00:12:59.100
that I can't in my regular government job.

289
00:12:59.100 --> 00:13:02.490
So because of that, it's an opportunity for me

290
00:13:02.490 --> 00:13:04.950
to give love in a group setting.

291
00:13:04.950 --> 00:13:08.010
And as corny as that sounds, it comes through,

292
00:13:08.010 --> 00:13:10.560
and I know the members who have stuck with us

293
00:13:10.560 --> 00:13:11.820
really enjoy it.

294
00:13:11.820 --> 00:13:15.613
And so that, for me, makes it really worthwhile.

295
00:13:15.613 --> 00:13:17.070
I wonder, do you...

296
00:13:17.070 --> 00:13:20.010
I know that many people at this time

297
00:13:20.010 --> 00:13:23.550
are feeling disconnected, feeling isolated, feeling lonely.

298
00:13:23.550 --> 00:13:26.130
And I know that having a vision impairment

299
00:13:26.130 --> 00:13:29.160
can kind of even add a another layer to that.

300
00:13:29.160 --> 00:13:32.040
Do you see that people are using your support groups

301
00:13:32.040 --> 00:13:34.770
in a way to kind of meet some of those particular needs

302
00:13:34.770 --> 00:13:36.630
or challenges that they're facing?

303
00:13:36.630 --> 00:13:37.920
For me, yes.

304
00:13:37.920 --> 00:13:40.770
I think the one thing that has changed or evolved

305
00:13:40.770 --> 00:13:44.460
for our group is that over the last year I've stopped

306
00:13:44.460 --> 00:13:47.850
having speakers, because what I realized pretty quickly

307
00:13:47.850 --> 00:13:51.300
is that people, when they got onto the Zoom call,

308
00:13:51.300 --> 00:13:54.397
they wanted to talk, and they wanted to just say,

309
00:13:54.397 --> 00:13:55.350
"Oh, so what's happening?

310
00:13:55.350 --> 00:13:57.120
Oh, last month I know you went to the hospital,

311
00:13:57.120 --> 00:13:57.953
what happened?"

312
00:13:57.953 --> 00:14:00.990
And it truly has become more of what I would consider

313
00:14:00.990 --> 00:14:03.870
a support group in a different kind of way,

314
00:14:03.870 --> 00:14:06.570
as opposed to here's a speaker that's talking

315
00:14:06.570 --> 00:14:09.000
about the latest thing in macular degeneration.

316
00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:11.220
And so it's been a very interesting evolution.

317
00:14:11.220 --> 00:14:13.770
I'm finding people wanting to come back

318
00:14:13.770 --> 00:14:16.140
for that one-on-one time.

319
00:14:16.140 --> 00:14:18.870
And it has also encouraged people

320
00:14:18.870 --> 00:14:20.850
calling me outside the group.

321
00:14:20.850 --> 00:14:23.910
So again, that's something new over the last year.

322
00:14:23.910 --> 00:14:25.860
It's a little bit different with our group

323
00:14:25.860 --> 00:14:27.960
because when we met in person,

324
00:14:27.960 --> 00:14:31.500
probably every third meeting was either a group discussion

325
00:14:31.500 --> 00:14:34.860
on a specific topic, or it was a coping meeting.

326
00:14:34.860 --> 00:14:37.950
And then the other two meetings would be a topic

327
00:14:37.950 --> 00:14:40.140
or a speaker kind of thing.

328
00:14:40.140 --> 00:14:42.007
One of our members had this great idea, it's like,

329
00:14:42.007 --> 00:14:43.590
"Why don't we just have a second meeting

330
00:14:43.590 --> 00:14:45.060
where people just talk?"

331
00:14:45.060 --> 00:14:49.020
So to get rid of that isolation and stuff.

332
00:14:49.020 --> 00:14:50.490
And we're actually gonna be trying that

333
00:14:50.490 --> 00:14:52.980
for the first time this Friday.

334
00:14:52.980 --> 00:14:54.060
We will see how it goes.

335
00:14:54.060 --> 00:14:56.640
And it was interesting when Lynndah was talking

336
00:14:56.640 --> 00:15:00.150
about different people, personalities.

337
00:15:00.150 --> 00:15:03.900
I actually talked to a potential new person today.

338
00:15:03.900 --> 00:15:06.870
And I was telling him how we were gonna have both these

339
00:15:06.870 --> 00:15:10.773
meetings, or our new social time meeting this Friday.

340
00:15:11.730 --> 00:15:13.350
That's the second Friday of the month.

341
00:15:13.350 --> 00:15:15.090
And then our fourth Friday of the month meeting

342
00:15:15.090 --> 00:15:16.860
will still kind of be that same structure

343
00:15:16.860 --> 00:15:20.220
where we have announcements, we have a set topic,

344
00:15:20.220 --> 00:15:21.420
we talk about coping.

345
00:15:21.420 --> 00:15:23.520
You know, this Friday's gonna be a kind of free for all.

346
00:15:23.520 --> 00:15:26.790
So I was talking to this man and he's got a new diagnosis.

347
00:15:26.790 --> 00:15:27.960
You know, he is still driving.

348
00:15:27.960 --> 00:15:29.580
He said, "But I'm just so scared

349
00:15:29.580 --> 00:15:32.130
because I don't know where this is going."

350
00:15:32.130 --> 00:15:35.820
And he had a father who basically got a diagnosis

351
00:15:35.820 --> 00:15:38.010
and then just sat in the chair and lost his vision,

352
00:15:38.010 --> 00:15:40.080
which is just so sad.

353
00:15:40.080 --> 00:15:41.827
So when I was talking to this person, I said,

354
00:15:41.827 --> 00:15:42.900
"Look, you know."

355
00:15:42.900 --> 00:15:45.930
He said, "Well, maybe I'll come to the fourth meeting,

356
00:15:45.930 --> 00:15:48.090
the fourth Friday meeting, the organized,

357
00:15:48.090 --> 00:15:49.860
detailed meeting kind of thing."

358
00:15:49.860 --> 00:15:52.740
I said, "Well, you know, you might wanna come on Friday."

359
00:15:52.740 --> 00:15:54.510
I said, "You can be a lurker."

360
00:15:54.510 --> 00:15:56.190
And you know, he's in his seventies.

361
00:15:56.190 --> 00:15:57.690
And it's like, "What does that mean?"

362
00:15:57.690 --> 00:15:59.550
I said, "You could just come and listen.

363
00:15:59.550 --> 00:16:02.490
And if you find a point where you wanna say something,

364
00:16:02.490 --> 00:16:03.720
then step in and say it.

365
00:16:03.720 --> 00:16:06.210
Otherwise you'll get to know the group,

366
00:16:06.210 --> 00:16:09.690
and you know, start putting names and voices together,

367
00:16:09.690 --> 00:16:12.900
and just see when you're ready to step in and share."

368
00:16:12.900 --> 00:16:15.990
And that's actually one advantage of doing the Zoom

369
00:16:15.990 --> 00:16:17.880
versus the in-person."

370
00:16:17.880 --> 00:16:18.713
I agree.

371
00:16:18.713 --> 00:16:22.020
I think actually this has ended up providing us

372
00:16:22.020 --> 00:16:25.500
with another avenue that I would've never thought

373
00:16:25.500 --> 00:16:28.710
about exploring had we not been sort of forced to do it.

374
00:16:28.710 --> 00:16:30.930
When this all first started, we were all trying

375
00:16:30.930 --> 00:16:32.910
to figure out, "Holy cow, what on earth is going on?

376
00:16:32.910 --> 00:16:34.680
How are we gonna do our jobs?"

377
00:16:34.680 --> 00:16:38.220
And no one gave a a second thought to the support group.

378
00:16:38.220 --> 00:16:40.470
And I kept thinking, "Okay, now more than ever,

379
00:16:40.470 --> 00:16:41.820
I gotta keep these people together.

380
00:16:41.820 --> 00:16:43.200
How am I gonna do this?"

381
00:16:43.200 --> 00:16:45.600
And what's interesting is that what's come out of this

382
00:16:45.600 --> 00:16:49.620
is that in my specific group, I've actually got some people

383
00:16:49.620 --> 00:16:51.720
who are attending more frequently,

384
00:16:51.720 --> 00:16:55.020
who had difficulty to get access to transportation,

385
00:16:55.020 --> 00:16:57.270
but they've shown up every month on the Zoom call,

386
00:16:57.270 --> 00:16:59.850
because of course they don't have to take transportation.

387
00:16:59.850 --> 00:17:01.597
So I've had a few people say to me,

388
00:17:01.597 --> 00:17:03.960
"You know, after we go back meeting in person,

389
00:17:03.960 --> 00:17:06.000
do you think you could still do a call

390
00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:07.830
like this every month, too?"

391
00:17:07.830 --> 00:17:11.490
So my goal, of course is to not lose the Zoom,

392
00:17:11.490 --> 00:17:14.160
but to add back in the personal meeting.

393
00:17:14.160 --> 00:17:15.630
It's wonderful that you guys have been able

394
00:17:15.630 --> 00:17:18.540
to maintain these groups, and these attendance,

395
00:17:18.540 --> 00:17:19.860
and the engagement.

396
00:17:19.860 --> 00:17:23.340
Do you ever run into members or people who are considering

397
00:17:23.340 --> 00:17:27.480
joining the group who are hesitant or reluctant to do so?

398
00:17:27.480 --> 00:17:28.950
And what do you kinda share with them

399
00:17:28.950 --> 00:17:30.960
to encourage them to consider it?

400
00:17:30.960 --> 00:17:33.750
This happens all the time where people...

401
00:17:33.750 --> 00:17:36.540
I mean, it takes a lot of courage for someone

402
00:17:36.540 --> 00:17:38.197
either to stop in my office and say,

403
00:17:38.197 --> 00:17:39.990
"Oh, I hear you've got a support group."

404
00:17:39.990 --> 00:17:44.040
Or to call and say, "My neighbor, is having vision loss

405
00:17:44.040 --> 00:17:46.290
and I told her I'd find out about the support group."

406
00:17:46.290 --> 00:17:48.960
So first of all, I'm delighted when people even stop to ask,

407
00:17:48.960 --> 00:17:51.030
'cause that's the biggest thing that they can do,

408
00:17:51.030 --> 00:17:52.800
is put in a query.

409
00:17:52.800 --> 00:17:54.960
I definitely like to talk to the person individually,

410
00:17:54.960 --> 00:17:57.300
and I like to walk very carefully.

411
00:17:57.300 --> 00:17:59.587
I don't pound them with too many questions of,

412
00:17:59.587 --> 00:18:01.080
"So what do you got? When's the diagnosis?

413
00:18:01.080 --> 00:18:01.913
How bad is your vision?"

414
00:18:01.913 --> 00:18:03.390
You know, I don't kind of go down that route.

415
00:18:03.390 --> 00:18:05.730
But just ask them, so what are your concerns?

416
00:18:05.730 --> 00:18:07.410
And what do you like to do?

417
00:18:07.410 --> 00:18:09.630
And tell me a little bit about your background.

418
00:18:09.630 --> 00:18:11.940
What did you do or do you do for a living?

419
00:18:11.940 --> 00:18:14.970
So I try to get to know that person first,

420
00:18:14.970 --> 00:18:17.160
and then it's no different than a sales pitch.

421
00:18:17.160 --> 00:18:20.430
So then just try to see if we can kind of talk in common

422
00:18:20.430 --> 00:18:21.577
and then eventually tell them,

423
00:18:21.577 --> 00:18:23.550
"You know, this is what it's like coming to one of our

424
00:18:23.550 --> 00:18:24.840
support group meetings."

425
00:18:24.840 --> 00:18:26.820
As Judy referred to kind of being a lurker,

426
00:18:26.820 --> 00:18:30.420
I encourage them to come and be a lurker.

427
00:18:30.420 --> 00:18:32.190
And if they don't wanna participate,

428
00:18:32.190 --> 00:18:33.750
I won't put them on the spot.

429
00:18:33.750 --> 00:18:34.890
You can bring your spouse.

430
00:18:34.890 --> 00:18:35.790
You can bring your daughter.

431
00:18:35.790 --> 00:18:38.940
You can come and enjoy the food, or via Zoom call,

432
00:18:38.940 --> 00:18:40.200
call in on a landline,

433
00:18:40.200 --> 00:18:42.325
and then that way you won't even be seen.

434
00:18:42.325 --> 00:18:45.210
I try and meet them where they are.

435
00:18:45.210 --> 00:18:50.210
I've also spent countless hours literally doing one-on-ones

436
00:18:50.310 --> 00:18:52.440
with people to help them learn how to use Zoom,

437
00:18:52.440 --> 00:18:53.970
if that's what they wanna do.

438
00:18:53.970 --> 00:18:57.450
So I think that has also helped for some of the new folks.

439
00:18:57.450 --> 00:18:59.610
Sometimes they come and they participate

440
00:18:59.610 --> 00:19:01.530
two or three times and then they're gone.

441
00:19:01.530 --> 00:19:02.400
And that's okay.

442
00:19:02.400 --> 00:19:05.640
You know, you can't get everybody to stay.

443
00:19:05.640 --> 00:19:09.030
But I think the whole thing is to not make them feel

444
00:19:09.030 --> 00:19:11.460
that they're gonna be put on the spot.

445
00:19:11.460 --> 00:19:14.100
I want them to feel like they're welcome

446
00:19:14.100 --> 00:19:15.960
and that I'm gonna be supportive for them.

447
00:19:15.960 --> 00:19:17.580
If they don't wanna come back, that's okay.

448
00:19:17.580 --> 00:19:18.660
I've done my best.

449
00:19:18.660 --> 00:19:20.310
So that's how I approach it.

450
00:19:20.310 --> 00:19:22.860
So many things that Lynndah said was just right on,

451
00:19:22.860 --> 00:19:24.060
you know, as far as our group too.

452
00:19:24.060 --> 00:19:26.430
A couple things I'd like to add.

453
00:19:26.430 --> 00:19:28.953
I have to confess, I'm a closet introvert.

454
00:19:30.104 --> 00:19:34.380
Every once in a while it rears up its head and I wanna hide.

455
00:19:34.380 --> 00:19:36.720
Since I have been involved with different support groups,

456
00:19:36.720 --> 00:19:38.820
I have had to reenter, you know, those groups

457
00:19:38.820 --> 00:19:41.610
as I've moved from state to state.

458
00:19:41.610 --> 00:19:44.910
Since I am an introvert, walking into a meeting

459
00:19:44.910 --> 00:19:47.550
where there are that many people is intimidating,

460
00:19:47.550 --> 00:19:50.970
even though I know that we have that shared ground.

461
00:19:50.970 --> 00:19:53.580
But a couple things I encourage people with,

462
00:19:53.580 --> 00:19:55.560
you know, like Lynndah was saying, I kind of explain

463
00:19:55.560 --> 00:19:58.260
how the meeting is set up and what's gonna happen.

464
00:19:58.260 --> 00:20:01.980
I give them a rough feel for the age range,

465
00:20:01.980 --> 00:20:05.610
and different eye conditions, and things like that.

466
00:20:05.610 --> 00:20:08.370
I encourage them to come to more than one meeting

467
00:20:08.370 --> 00:20:11.040
because one meeting, that topic may have not have been

468
00:20:11.040 --> 00:20:13.140
of any interest to them at all.

469
00:20:13.140 --> 00:20:15.330
And so coming to more than one meeting

470
00:20:15.330 --> 00:20:17.940
gives them a better feel for the group.

471
00:20:17.940 --> 00:20:19.830
And it is so clear for both of you guys

472
00:20:19.830 --> 00:20:22.350
that this is not a job for you, but it's a passion.

473
00:20:22.350 --> 00:20:24.660
And it speaks volumes as to why I think people

474
00:20:24.660 --> 00:20:25.830
are engaged in your groups,

475
00:20:25.830 --> 00:20:28.860
just because it's so important to you.

476
00:20:28.860 --> 00:20:30.240
I have just one last question.

477
00:20:30.240 --> 00:20:31.290
And again, I wanna thank you guys

478
00:20:31.290 --> 00:20:33.390
just for spending this time with Ricky and I,

479
00:20:33.390 --> 00:20:35.580
but if you had to put your finger on the thing

480
00:20:35.580 --> 00:20:39.060
that you enjoy most about your support group,

481
00:20:39.060 --> 00:20:40.650
what would you say?

482
00:20:40.650 --> 00:20:43.560
I think for me, from a selfish point of view,

483
00:20:43.560 --> 00:20:48.560
it's an opportunity that allows me to give from the heart.

484
00:20:49.710 --> 00:20:52.740
I work in a government job, and generally government workers

485
00:20:52.740 --> 00:20:54.090
aren't giving from the heart.

486
00:20:54.090 --> 00:20:55.950
You know, they're doing their job.

487
00:20:55.950 --> 00:20:58.590
I run transportation, I run all kinds of things.

488
00:20:58.590 --> 00:21:01.260
But this opportunity allows me to give.

489
00:21:01.260 --> 00:21:03.600
I think getting to know each one of the people

490
00:21:03.600 --> 00:21:06.450
in the group gives me such personal pleasure

491
00:21:06.450 --> 00:21:10.860
that I think it's very easy for me to try and grow the group

492
00:21:10.860 --> 00:21:14.070
because I just am emotionally so involved in it.

493
00:21:14.070 --> 00:21:17.994
So, like I said, it's a real labor of love for me, for sure.

494
00:21:17.994 --> 00:21:21.150
For me, because I do have a vision loss,

495
00:21:21.150 --> 00:21:24.870
there is just nothing like walking into a place

496
00:21:24.870 --> 00:21:27.660
where you are surrounded by people that you know

497
00:21:27.660 --> 00:21:29.940
understand what you're going through, you know?

498
00:21:29.940 --> 00:21:31.530
I mean, even though I've had vision loss

499
00:21:31.530 --> 00:21:36.240
for many, many years now, it's just like coming home.

500
00:21:36.240 --> 00:21:40.140
You know, it's just that sense of love, and camaraderie,

501
00:21:40.140 --> 00:21:42.690
and humor and that's it for me.

502
00:21:42.690 --> 00:21:45.630
It's just, you know, 'cause my family is not where I live,

503
00:21:45.630 --> 00:21:47.640
but my support group is my family

504
00:21:47.640 --> 00:21:49.680
because that is where I live.

505
00:21:49.680 --> 00:21:51.330
That's such a perfect summation.

506
00:21:51.330 --> 00:21:52.163
I love that.

507
00:21:52.163 --> 00:21:55.320
And this whole conversation has been amazing

508
00:21:55.320 --> 00:21:59.340
because, as Lynndah pointed out in the beginning,

509
00:21:59.340 --> 00:22:02.400
even though each of you has a completely different

510
00:22:02.400 --> 00:22:06.450
background and you're coming to this from different places,

511
00:22:06.450 --> 00:22:10.560
so to speak, there is just that common thing

512
00:22:10.560 --> 00:22:13.620
of wanting to bring people together

513
00:22:13.620 --> 00:22:16.800
and recognizing that people do need support,

514
00:22:16.800 --> 00:22:20.130
and they do need that comradery, and sort of that bond

515
00:22:20.130 --> 00:22:23.257
of being in the same room together and knowing that,

516
00:22:23.257 --> 00:22:26.670
"Hey, the other people here have experienced things

517
00:22:26.670 --> 00:22:28.170
that I'm going through,"

518
00:22:28.170 --> 00:22:31.050
or "I actually have some advice to share

519
00:22:31.050 --> 00:22:32.820
for this person because I've been there."

520
00:22:32.820 --> 00:22:34.020
That kind of thing.

521
00:22:34.020 --> 00:22:35.700
I think it's wonderful.

522
00:22:35.700 --> 00:22:39.330
As we wrap up here, and again, I really, really appreciate

523
00:22:39.330 --> 00:22:41.070
all of you for joining.

524
00:22:41.070 --> 00:22:44.430
Is there anything that we didn't touch on

525
00:22:44.430 --> 00:22:48.150
that you would want to say to someone,

526
00:22:48.150 --> 00:22:51.390
either who's thinking about going to a support group

527
00:22:51.390 --> 00:22:53.190
and just hasn't yet?

528
00:22:53.190 --> 00:22:55.350
Maybe they're thinking about starting a support group

529
00:22:55.350 --> 00:22:56.550
and they just haven't yet?

530
00:22:56.550 --> 00:22:59.070
Any final thing that you wanna share?

531
00:22:59.070 --> 00:23:01.080
What comes to mind is to be brave.

532
00:23:01.080 --> 00:23:03.300
It's so hard when you have a vision loss,

533
00:23:03.300 --> 00:23:05.280
especially when you're new to it.

534
00:23:05.280 --> 00:23:07.350
Because I went through years, and many people do,

535
00:23:07.350 --> 00:23:10.500
where we try to fake having vision loss.

536
00:23:10.500 --> 00:23:13.770
And luckily, when I made that move to Pennsylvania,

537
00:23:13.770 --> 00:23:15.480
I could no longer fake it.

538
00:23:15.480 --> 00:23:18.600
And so it's like, oh my gosh, it's so much easier

539
00:23:18.600 --> 00:23:21.360
to tell people I have a vision loss

540
00:23:21.360 --> 00:23:22.620
and that is why I need help,

541
00:23:22.620 --> 00:23:25.020
or that's why I didn't wave back at them.

542
00:23:25.020 --> 00:23:27.930
And so getting involved with support groups,

543
00:23:27.930 --> 00:23:30.090
it helps you increase that courage.

544
00:23:30.090 --> 00:23:31.410
You know, if you start by being brave

545
00:23:31.410 --> 00:23:34.830
and going to that meeting, your courage increases

546
00:23:34.830 --> 00:23:38.430
because, like you were saying, Ricky, you find people

547
00:23:38.430 --> 00:23:40.770
that have already conquered some of those mountains

548
00:23:40.770 --> 00:23:43.350
or those mole hills, and you can do it

549
00:23:43.350 --> 00:23:46.140
if you know that other people have done it.

550
00:23:46.140 --> 00:23:48.930
Oh, ditto. I couldn't say that better.

551
00:23:48.930 --> 00:23:51.750
And coming to a support group as a leader

552
00:23:51.750 --> 00:23:54.480
in a completely different capacity as Judy,

553
00:23:54.480 --> 00:23:58.890
it is that sense of, "I want to make sure

554
00:23:58.890 --> 00:24:00.600
that they feel brave."

555
00:24:00.600 --> 00:24:03.660
And so I try and bring as much information to the group,

556
00:24:03.660 --> 00:24:07.110
and try and help them find the resources that they need

557
00:24:07.110 --> 00:24:11.190
because it's so rewarding to watch somebody

558
00:24:11.190 --> 00:24:13.950
gain that courage and that confidence,

559
00:24:13.950 --> 00:24:15.150
and there's just nothing better.

560
00:24:15.150 --> 00:24:17.880
So again, Judy, you hit it spot on.

561
00:24:17.880 --> 00:24:19.080
It helps you be brave.

562
00:24:19.080 --> 00:24:20.790
And ask for help.

563
00:24:20.790 --> 00:24:22.290
Whether it's help to start a group

564
00:24:22.290 --> 00:24:26.550
or help to go to a group, don't be afraid to ask.

565
00:24:26.550 --> 00:24:27.810
Ask for help.

566
00:24:27.810 --> 00:24:29.940
Thank you both so much for that.

567
00:24:29.940 --> 00:24:33.570
And thank you for joining us here on the show.

568
00:24:33.570 --> 00:24:35.310
I appreciate all of your time

569
00:24:35.310 --> 00:24:37.620
and all of your wonderful information.

570
00:24:37.620 --> 00:24:38.453
Thank you.

571
00:24:39.420 --> 00:24:41.070
Got something to say?

572
00:24:41.070 --> 00:24:44.850
Share your thoughts about this episode of Hadley Presents,

573
00:24:44.850 --> 00:24:47.670
or make suggestions for future episodes.

574
00:24:47.670 --> 00:24:49.440
We'd love to hear from you.

575
00:24:49.440 --> 00:24:53.850
Send us an email at podcast@hadley.edu.

576
00:24:53.850 --> 00:24:58.850
That's P-O-D-C-A-S-T@hadley.edu.

577
00:24:58.980 --> 00:25:01.927
Or leave us a message at 847-784-2870.

578
00:25:05.730 --> 00:25:07.055
Thanks for listening.

579
00:25:07.055 --> 00:25:09.638
(gentle music)