WEBVTT

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(gentle music)

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Welcome to Hadley Presents.

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I'm your host, Ricky Enger, inviting you to sit back, relax,

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and enjoy a conversation with the experts.

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In this episode, director of community, Marc Arneson,

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interviews Hadley advisor, Eddie Becerra,

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to share his story of vision loss.

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Welcome to the show, both of you.

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Thanks, Ricky. Happy to be here.

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Thank you.

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So glad to have you both.

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So I introduced Eddie as a Hadley advisor,

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and what that is is probably not immediately apparent.

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I know that Marc, you've been on the program

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a couple of times before, and you as director of community

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have a chance to do a lot of support groups

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as well as help select and interact

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with our Hadley advisors.

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So these are people that get to share with us

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how they're feeling about what it is that we're doing,

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and they can tell us where we're missing the mark

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a little bit, and they can also say,

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"You know, wouldn't it be great

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if you guys created a workshop on such and such?"

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And so we love our Hadley advisors,

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and it's really cool to have one of them on the show.

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Marc and Eddie, I think that's how you guys met, right?

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Yeah, that's exactly right, Ricky.

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I think we were trying to figure out a workshop

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that we wanted to look at.

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We weren't quite sure if it was moving

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in the right direction, and so I reached out to Eddie,

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and he gave us some amazing feedback,

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some great insight just to make sure

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that we were kind of moving in the right direction.

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So yeah, Eddie and I got to spend some time together

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looking at a new workshop we were trying to put together.

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That's awesome and turns out

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that through that interaction,

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you realized that Eddie has a pretty cool story actually,

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and that's what we want to dive into today.

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So Marc, I know you have a lot of really great questions,

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and Eddie, we've been talking predominantly so far,

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and so that's going to change now

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'cause you get to share your story

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and be a major part of the conversation now too.

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So, Marc, I'm gonna turn it over to you.

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I know you've got some great questions.

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Like Ricky said, you did such a great job

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helping us out

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with some of the things that we're trying to do,

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and even more so, I just loved hearing your story,

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your kind of perspective and your vulnerability

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and just sharing kind of what life is like

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and what's going on.

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So, Eddie, do you mind sharing with me

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what your diagnosis is and what your vision

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is currently like?

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So I guess my sight loss story

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started about four years ago.

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One morning, I woke up, I was getting ready for work,

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and I dropped something on the floor, and as I bent over,

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I noticed I started seeing like a reddish blur

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in my left eye.

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So of course, that scared the bejeebies outta me,

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and I didn't know what was going on,

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but it was significant enough to where it clouded my vision.

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When you lose sight in one eye, what do you do?

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(laughing) You jump in your car

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and you drive to the emergency room.

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Once I got there and they looked me over,

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they saw that I had a retina detached.

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I had to have emergency surgery, and then after that,

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you know, of course I did the meetings

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and the consulting with the ophthalmologist,

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and of course, it was a retina detachment,

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and it was due to diabetic retinopathy.

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Once that was taken care of,

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they started looking at my right eye,

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and they noticed that I had a lot of broken blood vessels

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behind the eye.

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Even though I could see fairly well,

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they still wanted to get in there,

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wanted to cauterize the bleeds that were in my eyes.

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And after talking with the ophthalmologist, you know,

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I was trying to get an idea of how bad it was

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in the right eye, because at that point,

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we pretty much knew I wasn't going to get sight back

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in my left eye.

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He says it was probably one of the worst cases

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and the most number of broken blood vessels he had seen

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in a long time.

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We started laser treatments and such,

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and at this point, now I am completely blind.

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I don't have no vision in either eyes,

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no light perception, and I've been totally blind now

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for I wanna say pretty close to two, two and a half years.

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Wow. What an experience.

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You know, Eddie, I hear a lotta people,

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they go into these initial appointments

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and they're spending time with their doctor

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and people have different experiences

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when they're leaving the doctor's office,

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particularly like after an initial diagnosis

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or something like that, maybe before some of

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the actual surgeries happen.

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Do you remember some of those experiences,

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like with your doctors and what that was like?

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I guess the whole process was just a long

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journey of hope.

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You know, every time I would go in,

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"Well, you have this issue and this issue,

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and we're going to have to do another surgery,"

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but with that being said,

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they always used the term "should".

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You know, "After this procedure,

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you should retain some of your eyesight

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and maybe even regain some of it."

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And I just remember every surgery,

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it was always this big buildup and then this big let down

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because every surgery afterwards, just the sight,

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it just got worse and worse and worse,

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and that went on for almost a good 18 months.

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Someone can only take that sense of hope

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and then the let down so many times,

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and it just really starts wearing on you,

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and it's kind of a sad thing,

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but the last thing I ever saw was my last surgery,

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and the last thing I saw was the gentleman,

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the ophthalmologist who gave me more false hope.

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"When you come out of the surgery,

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you'll be wearing a patch for about a week,

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but then after this, you," once again,

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"should regain some of your eyesight back."

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Well, he was the last person I ever saw.

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After that last surgery, they were pretty much done with me.

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So the adjustment, you know,

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an 18-month period, I think you had said,

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when you were first driving to the emergency room

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until the surgeries were done,

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what an adjustment you've had to kind of,

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adjustment you've taken over these last 18 months.

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Like, what were some of the biggest challenges

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you think you faced during that 18-month period?

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Like I said, the back and forth

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of hope and disappointment,

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but once I knew that I was never gonna see again,

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I'll be totally honest, Marc, I was quite devastated.

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You know, I didn't know nothing about

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sight loss or blindness.

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I surely didn't know anybody else who was blind,

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and just judging from my initial experience,

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I thought pretty much life is over.

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Before I lost my sight, you know,

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I was very passionate, very busy,

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just always on-the-go kind of person, you know?

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I always had to be doing stuff.

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I had a lotta hobbies and very social person,

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and yeah, and it all came to a screeching halt.

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So basically my life turned from being this outgoing,

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straightforward person to just sitting around

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and not doing nothing.

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It was just horrible. It was a horrible experience.

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And it changed me, it radically changed me,

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and of course, the blindness radically changed my life.

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And I don't want to sound too melodramatic,

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but I just pretty much thought life was over.

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Well, and so Eddie, you know,

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I've gotten to know you a little bit better and, you know,

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I didn't know you when you first started losing your vision.

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I've gotten to know you since then

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and I know that you're a very outgoing,

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(laughing) very motivated guy.

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So what kind of inspired you to overcome

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some of these challenges that you were facing?

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To be honest, I don't think it was any one

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point in time

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that inspired me.

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I think it was more along the lines of anger

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and disappointment in myself, because like I said,

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I've always been this outgoing, very resilient person.

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I'm very adaptable.

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Like I said, it just changed me.

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I just, I wasn't that person anymore.

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I spent almost six months just sitting

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on the couch every day.

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I had no reason to wake up,

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and then I don't know what point in time per se,

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but I just remember waking up one morning

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and I was just so mad at myself.

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I was just so mad and disappointed,

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and I just kinda thought to myself, you know,

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"You big baby. Here you are.

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You're sitting on the couch, moping and crying,

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feeling sorry for yourself.

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This is not you.

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Pull up the bootstraps and let's do something about this."

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So once I decided that I was going to do something about it,

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I didn't know what to do.

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There has to be something to do, I can do,

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but what, you know?

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When I left the ophthalmologist's office

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for the last time, it was basically,

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"Well, we did all we could do.

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I am sorry. Have a good life."

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And he was off to the next patient.

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So there I am, totally blind,

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sitting in this doctor's office.

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You would think of any place, a doctor's office,

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if they knew you were going to be blind

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for the rest of your life,

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they would give you some kind of resources,

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some information, a handout, a phone number,

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you know, something, but they didn't.

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Now with that being said, I am not going to say

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that the level of care I got was substandard.

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This was one of the best eye clinics in the country.

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That's not their specialty.

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They don't deal with bedside manner very well,

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and I understand that's the nature of the business,

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but with that being said,

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there's other people in that doctor's office.

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Somebody in that place could be in charge of

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pulling somebody aside and giving them some information

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and some phone numbers, some point of contact,

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something, and that never happened.

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I ended up calling my friend,

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and he came over and we got on my computer,

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and we started looking for things,

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and it was just a basic search, you know?

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I think we punched in something like

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"resources for blind folks".

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With that, one of the first returns

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was a facility called Outlook Nebraska,

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where they have employment opportunities for blind folks,

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and they also do extracurricular activities

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with blind and low-vision people.

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So we ended up calling that facility,

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and we got talking to the receptionist,

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and I kinda gave her a synopsis of

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what was going on with me.

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And so she, I could tell there was,

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she really felt sorry for me because I was pretty broken up

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when I was talking to her.

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She was trying to reassure me things were going to be okay.

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So with that being said,

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she knew of a place here in Nebraska called

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the Nebraska Commission for the Blind and Visually Impaired.

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And basically what it is,

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it's state-ran vocational rehabilitation center.

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So she called one of the supervisors.

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As a matter of fact, she's out of Omaha.

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Her name is Nancy Flearl,

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and she kinda told her what I had said to her.

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Within about a half hour, Nancy Flearl called me back,

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told her my story.

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Once again, I was just really broken up,

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because I think at that time, once I knew there was help,

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there was just so much of a sense of relief.

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It was just a really big emotional rollercoaster that day,

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00:12:26.747 --> 00:12:30.900
and I think a lot of it was just I was just relieved

262
00:12:30.900 --> 00:12:34.320
that I kinda knew at that point I wasn't gonna be

263
00:12:34.320 --> 00:12:37.500
in my current situation the rest of my life.

264
00:12:37.500 --> 00:12:40.380
So Nancy set up an appointment

265
00:12:40.380 --> 00:12:43.470
where we would meet a week from that day,

266
00:12:43.470 --> 00:12:45.450
so, and I felt really good about it,

267
00:12:45.450 --> 00:12:46.920
and then about a half hour later,

268
00:12:46.920 --> 00:12:50.850
she calls me back and she says, "What are you doing today?"

269
00:12:50.850 --> 00:12:53.370
And I'm like, "Well, same thing I've been doing

270
00:12:53.370 --> 00:12:54.652
for the last few months.

271
00:12:54.652 --> 00:12:57.240
(laughing) I'm sitting on this couch."

272
00:12:57.240 --> 00:13:01.050
She's like, "How about if I stop over after lunch?"

273
00:13:01.050 --> 00:13:02.820
I'm like, "Okay, great."

274
00:13:02.820 --> 00:13:06.090
So I gave her my address and, you know,

275
00:13:06.090 --> 00:13:08.370
a little after lunch, she shows up.

276
00:13:08.370 --> 00:13:09.870
She comes in and she immediately,

277
00:13:09.870 --> 00:13:13.050
we get started on the paperwork, because at that time,

278
00:13:13.050 --> 00:13:17.520
they had quite a long waiting line to get into the center,

279
00:13:17.520 --> 00:13:20.370
and she kinda expedited my application

280
00:13:20.370 --> 00:13:21.690
to kinda bump me up a little bit

281
00:13:21.690 --> 00:13:23.940
to get me in a little sooner.

282
00:13:23.940 --> 00:13:26.520
So we're walking out and I remember

283
00:13:26.520 --> 00:13:30.240
it was a really nice late spring day,

284
00:13:30.240 --> 00:13:32.640
and we say our goodbyes,

285
00:13:32.640 --> 00:13:34.740
and as she's walking down the driveway,

286
00:13:34.740 --> 00:13:38.070
she says, "Oh, wait a minute."

287
00:13:38.070 --> 00:13:40.770
She says, "I forgot I have something for you."

288
00:13:40.770 --> 00:13:42.817
So she came walking back to me and she says,

289
00:13:42.817 --> 00:13:44.160
"How tall are you?"

290
00:13:44.160 --> 00:13:45.840
I'm like, "I'm six foot even."

291
00:13:45.840 --> 00:13:49.020
She says, "I think I might have one that'll fit you."

292
00:13:49.020 --> 00:13:52.260
She goes to her car and she comes back with a white cane,

293
00:13:52.260 --> 00:13:54.000
a long white cane.

294
00:13:54.000 --> 00:13:56.340
She spent about a half hour with me

295
00:13:56.340 --> 00:13:58.230
just up and down the driveway.

296
00:13:58.230 --> 00:14:01.230
She just showed me the real basic fundamentals.

297
00:14:01.230 --> 00:14:03.630
I mean, just basically, you know,

298
00:14:03.630 --> 00:14:05.490
how the cane sweeps back and forth

299
00:14:05.490 --> 00:14:09.450
and how you alternate between your steps and your cane.

300
00:14:09.450 --> 00:14:10.283
That was it.

301
00:14:10.283 --> 00:14:13.410
I mean, there was really no other really techniques,

302
00:14:13.410 --> 00:14:16.410
but man, I'm gonna tell you what, when she left,

303
00:14:16.410 --> 00:14:18.330
and I know there's blind folks out there.

304
00:14:18.330 --> 00:14:21.840
It was really hard for a lotta blind folks

305
00:14:21.840 --> 00:14:23.820
to accept the point in their life

306
00:14:23.820 --> 00:14:25.080
where they need a white cane,

307
00:14:25.080 --> 00:14:29.640
and I understand that completely, but in my case, oh man.

308
00:14:29.640 --> 00:14:33.030
I tell you what, you thought it was Christmas morning.

309
00:14:33.030 --> 00:14:36.720
That was the greatest gift I ever got. It really was.

310
00:14:36.720 --> 00:14:39.180
And after she left, I'm out there,

311
00:14:39.180 --> 00:14:42.540
and I'm bebopping back and forth,

312
00:14:42.540 --> 00:14:44.850
going up and down the driveway,

313
00:14:44.850 --> 00:14:47.220
and my buddy, he's just laughing at me.

314
00:14:47.220 --> 00:14:51.060
So we ended up jumping in his truck and we went to a park.

315
00:14:51.060 --> 00:14:54.930
I was able just to walk in the open space of this park,

316
00:14:54.930 --> 00:14:57.060
and I didn't know what I was doing with the cane.

317
00:14:57.060 --> 00:14:58.650
I just knew enough to swipe it

318
00:14:58.650 --> 00:15:01.127
to make sure I didn't run into trees,

319
00:15:01.127 --> 00:15:05.190
and my buddy, man, he just laughed so hard,

320
00:15:05.190 --> 00:15:06.030
and it was great.

321
00:15:06.030 --> 00:15:09.240
It was freedom. It was independence.

322
00:15:09.240 --> 00:15:11.970
That white cane was my ticket off the couch.

323
00:15:11.970 --> 00:15:14.730
Like I said, you're a much different guy

324
00:15:14.730 --> 00:15:16.350
that I know since I've met you

325
00:15:16.350 --> 00:15:17.910
than the guy sitting on the couch.

326
00:15:17.910 --> 00:15:21.090
How would you, like, describe yourself now

327
00:15:21.090 --> 00:15:24.420
and your life now compared to early on

328
00:15:24.420 --> 00:15:26.340
after some of those surgeries?

329
00:15:26.340 --> 00:15:27.173
Before all of this, before the

330
00:15:27.173 --> 00:15:28.006
vocational rehabilitation,

331
00:15:31.740 --> 00:15:33.510
I was existing.

332
00:15:33.510 --> 00:15:37.560
Now I'm living. I'm living life to the fullest.

333
00:15:37.560 --> 00:15:41.190
I'm having fun, and I tell a lot of my sighted friends

334
00:15:41.190 --> 00:15:44.673
and family this, and I really don't think they get it,

335
00:15:45.750 --> 00:15:47.520
but honestly, right now,

336
00:15:47.520 --> 00:15:50.550
I'm happier than I've ever been in my life.

337
00:15:50.550 --> 00:15:52.020
You know, before my blindness,

338
00:15:52.020 --> 00:15:54.870
it was all about material things,

339
00:15:54.870 --> 00:15:58.620
you know, the nice cars, the home and all that stuff,

340
00:15:58.620 --> 00:16:02.100
and that stuff's important, but it shouldn't rule your life,

341
00:16:02.100 --> 00:16:04.050
and it did mine, you know?

342
00:16:04.050 --> 00:16:07.830
And now it's just I feel that I'm free.

343
00:16:07.830 --> 00:16:11.580
The old me is, and again, I don't wanna sound melodramatic,

344
00:16:11.580 --> 00:16:13.830
but the old me is dead and gone.

345
00:16:13.830 --> 00:16:16.290
I don't miss that person anymore.

346
00:16:16.290 --> 00:16:18.720
Like I said, I'm happier than I've ever been in my life,

347
00:16:18.720 --> 00:16:21.330
and, you know, I wake up every morning

348
00:16:21.330 --> 00:16:23.610
and I just can't wait for my feet to hit the floor

349
00:16:23.610 --> 00:16:26.340
and to see what I'm gonna do that day.

350
00:16:26.340 --> 00:16:27.840
I get material things, you know,

351
00:16:27.840 --> 00:16:29.130
aren't the most important thing in life,

352
00:16:29.130 --> 00:16:31.440
but I do know that there are some material things

353
00:16:31.440 --> 00:16:32.700
that you really enjoy.

354
00:16:32.700 --> 00:16:34.890
Yeah, I like my tech, well,

355
00:16:34.890 --> 00:16:37.590
and that's the fascinating thing about tech.

356
00:16:37.590 --> 00:16:39.750
You know, I didn't know anybody

357
00:16:39.750 --> 00:16:42.450
who was blind or visually impaired,

358
00:16:42.450 --> 00:16:45.360
or when I finally lost all of my sight,

359
00:16:45.360 --> 00:16:48.600
I resided to a flip phone because, you know,

360
00:16:48.600 --> 00:16:50.790
I was a big Android guy before.

361
00:16:50.790 --> 00:16:53.880
You know, I was a big tech geek before I lost my sight.

362
00:16:53.880 --> 00:16:55.560
So I didn't think I was gonna ever get

363
00:16:55.560 --> 00:16:58.560
to use computers or smartphones.

364
00:16:58.560 --> 00:17:02.010
And I remember I went and got me this little Verizon,

365
00:17:02.010 --> 00:17:03.450
I don't even know what it was,

366
00:17:03.450 --> 00:17:05.790
but it was just some kind of little cheap flip phone,

367
00:17:05.790 --> 00:17:09.450
and, you know, on those, you can actually text.

368
00:17:09.450 --> 00:17:12.270
You know how it has the letters on the numbers

369
00:17:12.270 --> 00:17:13.800
and you gotta cycle through?

370
00:17:13.800 --> 00:17:17.700
Oh, that was just ridiculous. This is horrible.

371
00:17:17.700 --> 00:17:19.530
But once I lost my sight and I actually,

372
00:17:19.530 --> 00:17:22.500
once I got into vocational rehabilitation,

373
00:17:22.500 --> 00:17:25.830
you know, they introduced me to a lot of the technology,

374
00:17:25.830 --> 00:17:26.910
especially in the beginning.

375
00:17:26.910 --> 00:17:29.250
It made it bearable that I could actually play

376
00:17:29.250 --> 00:17:31.710
with tech now again, you know?

377
00:17:31.710 --> 00:17:35.040
That's the one thing that I'm really appreciative

378
00:17:35.040 --> 00:17:37.500
when it comes to vocational rehabilitation,

379
00:17:37.500 --> 00:17:40.890
especially for the service or the state service

380
00:17:40.890 --> 00:17:42.510
that I attend.

381
00:17:42.510 --> 00:17:44.970
They have a really good tech program.

382
00:17:44.970 --> 00:17:49.830
You know, they teach you everything from how to use iOS

383
00:17:49.830 --> 00:17:53.910
and JAWS and NVDA and Narrator,

384
00:17:53.910 --> 00:17:55.410
and I guess that's all I needed.

385
00:17:55.410 --> 00:17:57.060
I needed to know that I could get

386
00:17:57.060 --> 00:18:00.900
onto the information highway, and once I did that,

387
00:18:00.900 --> 00:18:02.910
then, you know, it was a no-brainer for me.

388
00:18:02.910 --> 00:18:04.710
I just did all my own research.

389
00:18:04.710 --> 00:18:09.390
And so one of the things I love now is technology,

390
00:18:09.390 --> 00:18:11.730
and after I leave the center,

391
00:18:11.730 --> 00:18:15.990
I am pursuing a career in accessible technologies.

392
00:18:15.990 --> 00:18:18.630
Hopefully one day, I'll be able to teach other blind

393
00:18:18.630 --> 00:18:22.650
and low-vision folks how to use accessible technology.

394
00:18:22.650 --> 00:18:24.420
Knowing you, the sky's the limit, Eddie,

395
00:18:24.420 --> 00:18:25.650
whatever you want to do.

396
00:18:25.650 --> 00:18:29.490
Hey, so I wanna go back to the doctor's office just quickly.

397
00:18:29.490 --> 00:18:30.720
I know that you had said, you know,

398
00:18:30.720 --> 00:18:32.370
being in an ophthalmologist's office,

399
00:18:32.370 --> 00:18:33.570
you think they would have something

400
00:18:33.570 --> 00:18:35.190
that they could hand somebody to direct you,

401
00:18:35.190 --> 00:18:39.300
but if you could go back, knowing your experience now,

402
00:18:39.300 --> 00:18:40.950
is there any advice that you would give

403
00:18:40.950 --> 00:18:43.560
to some of your doctors as you were kinda going

404
00:18:43.560 --> 00:18:44.880
through this journey?

405
00:18:44.880 --> 00:18:48.630
I think I would caution the doctor that I had

406
00:18:48.630 --> 00:18:51.900
about the false hope thing.

407
00:18:51.900 --> 00:18:55.297
I know people do not want to hear,

408
00:18:55.297 --> 00:18:58.680
"You're going blind and you probably won't see again."

409
00:18:58.680 --> 00:19:01.380
I know people don't want to hear that.

410
00:19:01.380 --> 00:19:04.710
It would be helpful in the long run

411
00:19:04.710 --> 00:19:07.740
if they would've been a little more honest with me.

412
00:19:07.740 --> 00:19:10.530
I don't even really want to use the word honest,

413
00:19:10.530 --> 00:19:12.780
maybe straightforward.

414
00:19:12.780 --> 00:19:16.113
I don't think he meant any harm, I really don't,

415
00:19:17.100 --> 00:19:19.680
and maybe some of it also is the way

416
00:19:19.680 --> 00:19:23.820
that I interpreted the information that they gave me.

417
00:19:23.820 --> 00:19:27.600
Maybe I was at a point to where I had all this hope

418
00:19:27.600 --> 00:19:30.360
and I wanted to hear what I wanted to hear.

419
00:19:30.360 --> 00:19:32.760
At the very least, they need to be able

420
00:19:32.760 --> 00:19:34.990
to provide you with some resources

421
00:19:36.090 --> 00:19:38.640
and not wait till the very end

422
00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:42.450
to where they can't do anything else for you,

423
00:19:42.450 --> 00:19:45.510
because my vision was bad enough,

424
00:19:45.510 --> 00:19:49.320
even at the beginning of all these procedures,

425
00:19:49.320 --> 00:19:52.950
that they coulda gave me some information

426
00:19:52.950 --> 00:19:56.190
because there is that term, legally blind,

427
00:19:56.190 --> 00:19:59.610
but I'm sure there was a point to where,

428
00:19:59.610 --> 00:20:01.410
before I lost all my sight,

429
00:20:01.410 --> 00:20:06.060
that I could've qualified for some help and some resources.

430
00:20:06.060 --> 00:20:07.800
Eddie, how about somebody who's going

431
00:20:07.800 --> 00:20:09.750
through this experience that you went,

432
00:20:09.750 --> 00:20:11.220
like is new to vision loss?

433
00:20:11.220 --> 00:20:14.400
Is there any advice that you would give to them?

434
00:20:14.400 --> 00:20:18.630
Seek resources. That's the most important part.

435
00:20:18.630 --> 00:20:22.860
Even if you're not a very social person,

436
00:20:22.860 --> 00:20:26.130
there are people out there that want to help you.

437
00:20:26.130 --> 00:20:28.590
There is great resources out there.

438
00:20:28.590 --> 00:20:32.216
Also, this is an,

439
00:20:32.216 --> 00:20:34.080
I don't know, I don't wanna say an exciting time,

440
00:20:34.080 --> 00:20:37.530
but this is a good time to be blind

441
00:20:37.530 --> 00:20:42.120
because there's just so many technical advances

442
00:20:42.120 --> 00:20:46.110
that have happened just within the last four or five years,

443
00:20:46.110 --> 00:20:48.960
things, you know, like accessive technology

444
00:20:48.960 --> 00:20:52.380
and just in the blindness world alone,

445
00:20:52.380 --> 00:20:54.570
and I'm gonna use the term for myself.

446
00:20:54.570 --> 00:20:58.950
It's quite exciting because if I would've lost my sight

447
00:20:58.950 --> 00:21:02.013
let's say 10 years ago, maybe even 5 years ago,

448
00:21:03.000 --> 00:21:06.780
surely there wouldn't have been the technical things

449
00:21:06.780 --> 00:21:10.470
that help me throughout my day and throughout my life,

450
00:21:10.470 --> 00:21:15.470
and especially now with like the social aspect of blindness,

451
00:21:16.320 --> 00:21:18.780
especially like social media,

452
00:21:18.780 --> 00:21:21.330
and I think that also helps me too,

453
00:21:21.330 --> 00:21:25.170
being able to share experiences with other blind folks.

454
00:21:25.170 --> 00:21:27.360
Yeah, I think all those things are important,

455
00:21:27.360 --> 00:21:30.360
so the community, the reaching out

456
00:21:30.360 --> 00:21:33.150
and finding like-minded people,

457
00:21:33.150 --> 00:21:36.210
whether it's somebody who is blind

458
00:21:36.210 --> 00:21:39.930
or somebody who is interested in astronomy like you are,

459
00:21:39.930 --> 00:21:43.110
so just getting that sense of community back.

460
00:21:43.110 --> 00:21:46.530
And then the other thing I liked that you mentioned

461
00:21:46.530 --> 00:21:51.530
was searching for resources, 'cause I think that people

462
00:21:52.110 --> 00:21:55.020
who were experiencing a vision loss

463
00:21:55.020 --> 00:21:58.687
feel the same way you do when you were on the couch.

464
00:21:58.687 --> 00:22:01.920
"I feel alone. I feel hopeless."

465
00:22:01.920 --> 00:22:04.950
And so knowing that there is hope,

466
00:22:04.950 --> 00:22:08.310
and whether that's hope for regaining some of your vision

467
00:22:08.310 --> 00:22:10.890
or just hope that this isn't the end

468
00:22:10.890 --> 00:22:13.290
of what life can be for you,

469
00:22:13.290 --> 00:22:16.253
that's an important thing to have, right?

470
00:22:16.253 --> 00:22:18.960
I think what it also comes down to is

471
00:22:18.960 --> 00:22:23.960
the sense of independence, doing it my way,

472
00:22:24.780 --> 00:22:28.710
and I'm gonna borrow this tagline from the NFB,

473
00:22:28.710 --> 00:22:33.630
but it goes something like, "Doing what I want, when I want,

474
00:22:33.630 --> 00:22:38.630
how I want without inconveniencing myself or others."

475
00:22:39.270 --> 00:22:40.683
That's priceless.

476
00:22:41.520 --> 00:22:44.190
You know, I think that's another thing

477
00:22:44.190 --> 00:22:47.280
that really disturbed me when I was sitting on that couch.

478
00:22:47.280 --> 00:22:48.780
Everything that I had to do,

479
00:22:48.780 --> 00:22:50.793
I had to depend on somebody else.

480
00:22:51.720 --> 00:22:54.120
When you're interacting with friends and family

481
00:22:54.120 --> 00:22:56.700
and you're blind and you can't help yourself,

482
00:22:56.700 --> 00:23:01.410
and this is no fault of them because they were like I was.

483
00:23:01.410 --> 00:23:03.390
I did not know any blind people.

484
00:23:03.390 --> 00:23:06.570
I did not know how to interact with blind people,

485
00:23:06.570 --> 00:23:09.330
but everybody did everything for me.

486
00:23:09.330 --> 00:23:11.790
And as somebody, before I lost my sight,

487
00:23:11.790 --> 00:23:14.580
who was as independent as I was,

488
00:23:14.580 --> 00:23:16.743
that's what tore me down the most,

489
00:23:17.580 --> 00:23:20.070
not being able to do it myself,

490
00:23:20.070 --> 00:23:23.430
and that's what kept me on that couch.

491
00:23:23.430 --> 00:23:25.020
And it's also what motivated you

492
00:23:25.020 --> 00:23:26.460
to get off the couch, right?

493
00:23:26.460 --> 00:23:28.920
Yeah, yeah, because like I said,

494
00:23:28.920 --> 00:23:30.810
I got tired of being a big baby

495
00:23:30.810 --> 00:23:33.090
and just sitting around feeling sorry for myself.

496
00:23:33.090 --> 00:23:35.463
I was embarrassed of myself, you know?

497
00:23:36.630 --> 00:23:38.790
It's like, come on, you know?

498
00:23:38.790 --> 00:23:42.783
This can't be it. This can't be the rest of my life.

499
00:23:43.740 --> 00:23:47.310
So fast forward to today, I'm very happy.

500
00:23:47.310 --> 00:23:51.000
I'm finishing up my time at the training center.

501
00:23:51.000 --> 00:23:52.530
I'll be graduating soon

502
00:23:52.530 --> 00:23:56.313
and off to life's next big challenge.

503
00:23:57.180 --> 00:23:59.073
Eddie, this is great.

504
00:23:59.940 --> 00:24:02.400
I mean, thanks for sharing so much.

505
00:24:02.400 --> 00:24:04.770
And I wanted to say one more thing.

506
00:24:04.770 --> 00:24:07.563
We talked about networking with other blind folks,

507
00:24:08.400 --> 00:24:12.600
and I'm sure most of your listeners are familiar

508
00:24:12.600 --> 00:24:16.950
with your discussion groups, but way before Clubhouse,

509
00:24:16.950 --> 00:24:19.980
way before I got back on Twitter,

510
00:24:19.980 --> 00:24:24.810
I always loved going to the Hadley discussion groups.

511
00:24:24.810 --> 00:24:29.010
I would even attend things that I wasn't even interested in,

512
00:24:29.010 --> 00:24:32.700
like the crafts and things like that

513
00:24:32.700 --> 00:24:35.370
because the people in there are just so nice,

514
00:24:35.370 --> 00:24:39.810
and it's just a great place to go and interact with, like,

515
00:24:39.810 --> 00:24:41.670
people like yourself.

516
00:24:41.670 --> 00:24:45.360
And we'll have a link to those discussion groups

517
00:24:45.360 --> 00:24:46.950
in our show notes, and also,

518
00:24:46.950 --> 00:24:49.080
if any people want to reach you,

519
00:24:49.080 --> 00:24:51.000
maybe go follow you on Twitter,

520
00:24:51.000 --> 00:24:55.110
we can have that information in the show notes as well,

521
00:24:55.110 --> 00:24:57.840
if you like, if people wanna reach out.

522
00:24:57.840 --> 00:25:01.500
Yes, if you wanna get a hold of me on Twitter,

523
00:25:01.500 --> 00:25:06.500
I'm @eddieisblind, all one word, of course.

524
00:25:07.140 --> 00:25:10.643
You can find me on Clubhouse, @eddieisblind,

525
00:25:11.670 --> 00:25:16.295
and you can also find me on Reddit, eddieisblind.

526
00:25:16.295 --> 00:25:17.128
Fantastic.

527
00:25:17.128 --> 00:25:21.780
Well, thank you so much for sharing just your journey

528
00:25:21.780 --> 00:25:25.020
of what it was like to ride that rollercoaster

529
00:25:25.020 --> 00:25:29.400
and then ultimately get into a place where you are happy

530
00:25:29.400 --> 00:25:32.340
and you're ready to share that

531
00:25:32.340 --> 00:25:34.890
with other people in a similar situation.

532
00:25:34.890 --> 00:25:37.740
Really appreciate your joining us on the show.

533
00:25:37.740 --> 00:25:38.880
Oh, and Eddie, I mean,

534
00:25:38.880 --> 00:25:41.010
I so enjoy every time I spend with you.

535
00:25:41.010 --> 00:25:44.040
So I think there's so many people that are new

536
00:25:44.040 --> 00:25:46.770
to vision loss and trying to figure out this whole thing

537
00:25:46.770 --> 00:25:48.780
that are just gonna relate to so many things

538
00:25:48.780 --> 00:25:51.420
that you were able to share and so many, you know,

539
00:25:51.420 --> 00:25:52.530
some great advice you were able to give,

540
00:25:52.530 --> 00:25:54.360
so I so appreciate that.

541
00:25:54.360 --> 00:25:56.970
Oh, you bet you, and thank you guys for having me.

542
00:25:56.970 --> 00:25:58.770
This has been a wonderful experience,

543
00:25:58.770 --> 00:26:01.140
and I just really believe what you folks

544
00:26:01.140 --> 00:26:04.080
at Hadley are doing is such a good thing,

545
00:26:04.080 --> 00:26:07.680
especially since you've revamped your curriculum.

546
00:26:07.680 --> 00:26:12.680
It's just a great place for information and for networking,

547
00:26:12.870 --> 00:26:17.010
and I personally really appreciate what you folks do.

548
00:26:17.010 --> 00:26:20.670
Thank you both. Got something to say?

549
00:26:20.670 --> 00:26:24.480
Share your thoughts about this episode of Hadley Presents

550
00:26:24.480 --> 00:26:27.240
or make suggestions for future episodes.

551
00:26:27.240 --> 00:26:29.010
We'd love to hear from you.

552
00:26:29.010 --> 00:26:33.420
Send us an email at podcast@hadley.edu.

553
00:26:33.420 --> 00:26:38.420
That's P-O-D-C-A-S-T @hadley.edu,

554
00:26:38.550 --> 00:26:40.050
or leave us a message

555
00:26:40.050 --> 00:26:45.050
at 847-784-2870.

556
00:26:45.300 --> 00:26:46.790
Thanks for listening.

557
00:26:46.790 --> 00:26:49.373
(upbeat music)