A desire to help others doesn't change just
because your vision does,
but you might have questions about how to make it work.
In this episode, Char Cook
and Linda Jenkins join us
to discuss volunteering with vision loss.
I'm Ricky Enger and this is Hadley Presents.
Welcome to the show, Char, Linda.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
I enjoy being asked to be part of this.
Yes, I'm happy that you both volunteered to join us.
So I am so excited to learn more about each of you
and your journey with volunteering.
I think it's going to be a great time.
So to get us started,
why don't you each just tell us a little bit about yourself,
as much of your vision loss journey
as you're comfortable sharing.
And yeah, we'll start there. So Linda, we'll start with you.
Okay. I think I began volunteering when my mother
set me up, let's put it that way.
I was, I think, 14 years old
and she said, "Oh, there's some people in a men's shelter
and they would like to meet you
and they'd like your help." And I said, "Wow,
that would be great." Then when I was 16,
I became a candy striper at the hospital.
I did that for a while. Most of my life
I was sighted, fully sighted.
And I did volunteer
and my family volunteered at various places,
but normal community things.
I was not diagnosed with RP until I was 50 years old.
Once I was diagnosed and I had already given up driving
and things like that, that's when I really had issues
that were based on my not being able to see anymore.
So volunteering seems like it has always been a part of
who you are, even though your mom may have set you up,
but you didn't have vision loss as a part of this until
much, much later.
Shar, I think your approach was a little different.
So tell us about you and your background
and when you started volunteering.
Thank you. Well, I also have RP,
retinitis pigmentosa,
and I started to lose my sight when I was seven.
But I lived pretty unhappily for some years
until I found that I could be happy and be blind.
And my first introduction to volunteerism was
I heard a radio announcement in Portland, Oregon,
and they were asking people to volunteer to man a
metro crisis line.
And I wanted to do that so bad.
And I went to the interview and they liked to be okay,
but they said someone blind couldn't possibly do this.
And I said, "Give me a chance." So I was able to do that.
But what changed me was during the training
to be a metro crisis line volunteer,
they did a training on talking to people who are depressed.
And the thing that changed me was they said a main
anecdote to depression is to reach out
to someone else and do something for someone.
That changed me and that began my journey with volunteerism.
Wow, that is so incredible.
I mean, being inspired by something like that that spoke
to you on a personal level
and I think really changed how you approached a lot
of things, no doubt.
So you were always either fully blind
or maybe you had some vision at some point,
but regardless, you kind of didn't have
to think about volunteering differently from
the beginning and then as you proceeded with vision loss.
Whereas Linda, you did.
So you were losing your sight much later in life
after you'd already done some volunteering.
So did that affect kind of
how you thought about can I volunteer?
Will I be able to do this? How's any of that going to work?
What's interesting is the one thing that Shara
and I have in common is that
I volunteered at a crisis telephone service
and I did that for six and a half years.
And the nice thing about it is
that even though I was losing my vision, I was not able to
see people or the reactions because it was on the telephone.
I knew that I could just talk to people on the phone.
So that was kind of an introduction for me that
I didn't have to see in order to be able to provide
that volunteer service.
And then as you were thinking about different ways to
volunteer, Linda, so maybe as you're approaching retirement,
that kind of thing, or you're just kind of looking at
what am I going to do after I stop working?
What were you thinking about how
or whether you even could continue to volunteer?
What's interesting about that is that about the time
that I was going to retire, I had always thought in the back
of my mind that I'd like to volunteer at the hospital
as an adult and retired person
in the pastoral care department.
I'm not sure whether you're familiar with this,
but some hospitals and congregations of churches
or synagogues or temples have what's called a
pastoral care Steven Ministry program.
And I wanted to do that.
But the closer I got to retirement age
and the less I could see, I just thought I'm going to have
to erase it from my bucket list.
Luckily I had some good friends
who were saying, "What are you doing?
Why can't you do that?
" I said, "I can't see." And I happened to know that a lot
of being able to communicate
with people one-to-one is based on body language
and expressions and things like that.
I said, "No, I can't do that anymore." And
so they basically, I'm going to say, bactered me.
Let's just do this anyway. Just try it.
So I did go through the training and I passed.
And for over eight
and a half years, I volunteered at least one day a week
at the hospital visiting patients.
And I did discover that
volunteering gave me some structure and purpose
because I thought as I was losing my vision, I'd have
to drop out of an awful lot of stuff.
Yeah. And what a relief, I'm sure, to find out
that's actually not the case.
You can continue to give back in a way
that really feels authentic to you.
And it didn't turn out to be as big a deal
as you thought that
you couldn't see for sure.
When you are thinking about volunteering,
what is that process like?
We all know that sometimes people
are a little bit reticent to
let us do things that we think we can do,
or maybe it's a situation
where it's not clear initially, how are you going
to do this as a blind or low vision person?
Can you share some things about that, Char?
Absolutely. And I have found,
and this has been a thread through my life
that I have always been looking for opportunities
to do things, whether it's recreation
or whether it's something that we would do
as a couple or as a family.
I've always just been actively looking.
And so that has been a carryover to
what can I do for someone else?
I have found that I recognize an opportunity for myself
sooner than someone else would reach out to me
and say, "Would you like to try this?
" For me, it's been a matter of keeping my doors
and windows open
and hearing about, "Oh, I think I'd like to try that, "
or, "I think I'll call them
and see." And then people might say, "But how can you do
that with vision loss?" And my answer is,
"Let me just tell you about technology
or let me tell you about my background with people
or food or whatever it is.
But I've generally brought to the table my own solutions.
And Linda, what about you?
What are some practical things that you kind
of figured out along the way?
Whether it was, okay, I've got all these patients
to visit in the hospital.
How am I going to know what their situation is
or transportation getting there or just any of that stuff?
What have you figured out along the way
that has worked for you?
Well, luckily, I have a friend
who volunteered at the hospital also
and she said," Well, I'll come pick you up.
I'll bring you home. Doesn't much matter.
"And I said," Are you sure? "She said," Yeah, that's fine.
"I did get the list of patients
that were in the hospital each day
and I made decisions as to who I wanted to see
and who I didn't want to see.
And of course I used the word see in quotes.
But anyway, but I have victory
or so I would record the names, the room numbers
and the names of people that I'm planning to see.
The other way I got to see people is as I got
to know the staff at the hospital, of course I'm walking up
and down the hallways and checking room
numbers and things like that.
I would have somebody say, "Hey, Linda,
can you see somebody in room number such and such?
I think she would really enjoy getting to know you.
" And I said, "Sure, that was fine." And it turned out that
maybe that person actually had a friend
or a family member or herself was losing her vision.
And I was able to provide some resources and encouragement
and empathy and acknowledging that I've been there too.
I understand that. So that was pretty good.
So it sounds like that was a lot
of connecting with people.
And as you connected with one person that enabled you
to connect with yet more people,
and it's just something that kind of builds on itself,
which is what a beautiful thing.
So I think that both of you are actually still volunteering.
This is a really important part of your life.
And presumably that means that it is
doing something for you.
It's giving something.
It's adding some value to your life.
Shara, can you talk about that a little?
I would so love to. So I've done a few things
through the years, but probably my all time favorite is when
COVID started in 2020, my sister said to me,
"We have to do something.
We have to help people.
" So the two of us decided that we could make homemade soup.
And I am blind. She is not. I make the soup.
She has figured out the list, arranged the drivers
for delivery, things like that.
And we've been doing that either together
or I've been doing it solo since 2020.
And there is something about handing someone a quart
of soup that fills you up on the inside.
And to this day, I'm looking closely at retirement soon
and I find sometimes I have a little too
much time on my hands.
I go in the kitchen, make a plot of soup, two
or three gallons, and give it away to people I know
that could need that.
That has enriched my life emotionally,
socially, physically.
And I hope to do that as long as I can.
It's just something that's not a big thing but big to me.
Wow. Kitchen therapy
and volunteering, what an incredible combination.
I love that. And Linda,
what does volunteering bring
to your life? What do you get out of it?
Yeah, just listening to Shar.
I understand that it gives me structure and purpose in life.
I must admit, when I started to understand
that I'm definitely going blind,
I could no longer cover it, let's put it that way.
I went through some depression for a while
and then had people reach out or I reached out
and things just happened.
At one point we had something,
I believe it was at our church or in the community.
And I said, "Is there something I can do to help?"
They said, "Well,
can you dry dishes?" I said, "Yeah, I sure can.
" Well, I got to meet some other people, washing, drying,
sanitizing things and all that.
And then people got to know me
and knowing that I was available.
So even Shar was mentioning her sister was calling people.
I got to the point where people would say, "Hey,
can you call these 10 people
and invite them to come to this?
They have email, but we're not sure
that they really use it as much as they can.
" And I said, "Oh, sure, I can do that.
" So from time to time,
met different people in different ways.
And that was so important to me.
So I was saying it gave me structure and purpose in my life
and was affirming then to me that I was not useless anymore.
I could provide some things.
And I still continue to do that.
Some people at one point I had called my eye doctor
and she said, "Hey,
I have an opening on a patient family advisory council.
It'd be perfect for that. We do it with Zoom.
Would you be interested?" And I said, "Sure." Well,
that was 15 years ago and I still do that.
Another thing is that I knew somebody who was involved
with one of our preschools in the area, private preschool.
And they said, "Hey, we need somebody on the board.
Can you join that? " And I eventually filled an entire term
for six years and I became the chair of that committee.
And it's amazing with technology that I could do agendas.
I didn't do the minutes, but somebody else did.
But it worked out really well and we became friends
and that is just so important.
So at this point in my life, a couple
of things have rotated off at this point.
But for the most part, I'm really happy and satisfied.
So they're the kind of friends
that I would not have met had I been volunteering in the
past, but that have maintained friendships all along.
And Linda, don't you think that being
with people just normalizes who
You Are and how you do things?
Absolutely. And then the people around you just say,
"Oh, this is Linda.
She does this and that and this and that.
" And blindness then becomes on the back burner.
Right. I am not defined by blindness.
I'm identified as a friend.
It's such a nice change from
feeling like you can't give back
to then just being an integral person to
what is happening and people are calling you up
and inviting you to lunch because you're a friend now.
So for both of you,
you've probably been in a situation where
someone has told you or implied, "You can't do this.
You can't volunteer." Or
at some point you've thought it yourself.
And I know there are people listening who
are thinking that right now.
I don't think I can do this.
What would you say to someone who's having those feelings
that I can't volunteer?
I want to give back, but I can't.
Shar, we'll start with you.
I want to say to every person listening
who has vision loss, you have value
and there are things in your life
that you do and you do well.
And to start with that is recognizes that
that's part of this world is the value you bring.
You remember people on their birthdays,
you never forget to call them.
Could it be you at the church you go to,
you could be on the greeting committee
or you could teach Sunday school
or you could go to a neighborhood block party
and bring your best dish of baked beans.
But you, because you're recognizing the value you bring
and the talents, build on those
because you have them and recognize them
and then build on those to reach out
and spread your sunshine.
I
Absolutely agree with you 100%.
And it's so interesting that you talk about
even like a community or the church, whatever.
One thing that has, I don't want to say has nothing to do
with volunteering, but it has been part
of my connecting with people.
At some point I was taking the Hadley course on Braille
and I decided I was going to Braille onto a little three
by five card, a couple of the kids' names.
It was practice for me and they just loved it.
I mean, one kid had folded in half
and said, "This is my badge." And I found out
that he is now 14 years old and he still has that.
And I said, "Josh, you want me to redo it?
" He said, "Probably. Yeah.
" But with that, the children were comfortable
with me much more than their parents were.
And what's funny is it's like, "Mrs.
Linda, can I give you my right elbow
and I'll take you here?" And I'll say, "Oh yeah,
that would be great." So the kids became comfortable,
families became comfortable, I became comfortable.
And that's just kind of a natural community
that has developed for me.
But anyway, I'm glad you brought that up, Char,
because I agree with you 100%. Yes.
Thank you. And I teach Sunday school.
My kids that I teach are two years old
and been teaching the two-year-old children for 40
or 50 years maybe.
It's exactly what you say.
The parents become very comfortable
because the children are as comfortable as can be.
And then for the rest of our lives,
as I see the children grow
or their prints, "Hey, Shar, it's Linda.
How are you? Remember when you were my teacher?"
That has filled my cup up to overflowing as well.
Label my books in braille
and send out letters saying, "Remember when you see me,
don't forget to speak." All the things you do
which normalizes blindness
and then you're part of a community
and of course doing something that you love to do.
I have the biggest smile on my face as I'm listening
to both of you because that's how it happens is
you become known to one set of people
and I think that's important.
So this has been even beyond my expectations
and they were really high to begin with.
So wow, thank you both so much for sharing
your wisdom and your stories and it's just been incredible.
As we wrap up,
and I think each of you has alluded to this a bit already,
but if someone is thinking, okay, I really want to volunteer
and I just don't know
where to get started.
How can people think about this in order to
discover what those talents might be
or something that they could at least reach out and try?
Shar, we'll start with you.
I think the best way is to think about
what would you like to do?
When I responded to a radio ad where they were asking
for people to volunteer on a metro crisis line, I knew
I would like to do that very much.
I started there. So I would say if you don't like talking
to people, then that's not what you want to do.
You like just maybe being in the children's ministry
or maybe you like going to
the neighbor's house when they could use a little some
cookies, something like that.
Go with what you know and like
and then reach out from there.
Linda, what about you? Think about
what you enjoy doing, just like Shara's saying,
what you enjoy doing and look at your strengths
and get with your friends, people who you're close to
or even not close to,
but just say, "I'm at a point in my life where I'd like
to have some more involvement in the community.
Do you have any suggestions?" Now the thing about asking
your friends is they know you maybe even too well.
They know what you can do, what you can't do,
and they can say, "Wait a minute,
why don't you follow up with this?
" And they also know your quirks
and that can be a benefit.
I have been told I have kind
of a quirky personality sometimes
and that suits me really well with people.
But people have given me ideas.
It's like, "I never though about that.
" And it connects you even with your friends even closer.
Yeah. Just letting people give you some ideas
and then being willing to think outside the box yourself.
And I like how neither of you started with think about
what you can do
because that already might feel a little bit limiting.
You may not know what you can do.
It's more, "What do I like to do?
What do I wish I was spending my time doing?" And I think
that's such a great way to frame it
and you're likely to find something that works for you.
Thank you both so much for spending a little time with us.
I know people are going to appreciate hearing your stories
and your thoughts about how
to go about volunteering. This has been amazing.
Ricky, thank you for letting us share.
Thank you very much. Got something to say?
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