"There's no way around it, just a way through it"
Doug was filled with uncertainty after realizing that the vision he lost was unlikely to be restored. His anxiety grew as the silver bullet he hoped for never materialized. But he did find things that helped him manage and continue to live his life with purpose.
Hadley
“There’s no way around it, just a way through it”
Doug: I was truly going down the grief path. I was looking for the silver bullet. I was looking for something that would make this all go away. But there wasn't any silver bullet.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Doug: Hi, everybody. My name's Doug. I'm from Carmel, Indiana, which is a suburb of Indianapolis. So about two and a half years ago, I had what's called non-arthritic Anterior Ischemic Optic Neuritis in my right eye. So, my right eye started losing some sight and went to the ophthalmologist and got diagnosed. I mean there's nothing we can do.
And you're the result of a disruption of blood flow to your optic nerve and you got some damage there and you're going to have vision loss in that eye. And I did as a as it ran its course. But my left eye was still fine. And after some adjustment to depth perception, etc., I went on with my life as I always had.
Approximately two years later, in June of 2025, my left eye started down the same path. So now, instead of just having NAION as they call it now, I had subsequent bilateral NAION which is extremely rare from what I'm told. My vision loss journey really started just about six months ago. I was in a mental mess. It was really tough.
I, you know, I just was looking forward and trying to figure out how am I going to live my life. You know, my with just full of uncertainty, full of anxiety, depression. I didn't sleep very much, just kind of felt helpless, felt lack of purpose in life and all those things. I was truly going down the grief path.
And for me, that lasted about four months. And in that time, I was looking for the silver bullet. I was looking for something that was gonna make this all go away. And so, I did a lot of things that helped me. I ramped up my exercise regimen for sure, and that would take my mind off of my problems for a while.
I, you know, worked with a therapist a little bit and to get some help dealing with anxiety, depression, things work with my primary care doctor or to help with some sleep issues. But there wasn't any silver bullet. There were just things...as long as I was doing something to help keep my mind busy with something else that was good.
And if I was just sitting in the chair doing nothing, that was bad. And so there was one thing that I was told early on in my in that part of my journey. She’s actually an occupational therapist, who goes to our church and she told me, you're just proving that you're human. And now really stuck with me, and it forced me to think a lot deeper about what I'm going through at the time.
And, I knew that, well, this happens when you have a great life change or a great life loss, you know, your brain goes into this grief mode. And that's obviously, you what what's happening to me? And I have experienced that done, before in life, I've lived long enough to have some loss here and there.
But I knew that that's just what happens and what your brain does. It puts you through this tough love period and helps you to negotiate what you're going through. And I think prepares you to be able to survive and thrive much better in your new, life environment after you come out of your grief.
And so, I knew there was an end to it. And I knew that this is something that I'm not alone. Other people go through this too. And I just I knew there was an end and I knew there could be some silver linings in that end and some good things that come out of it. I just gotta plow through it step by step and move forward.
And I learned that, you know, there's no way around it. There's just a way through it, and there's only a way through it on your own two feet.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 85
When Nancy's vision deteriorated to the point that it was challenging to navigate streets of a neighborhood she walked for decades, it was humbling. But a friend's comment surprised and inspired her. Her perspective started to shift.
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Episode 84
Macular degeneration was no stranger to Valerie, her mom had the condition. Early into her own diagnosis of AMD, treatments worked well and her vision remained stable. Over time, however, she noticed more significant changes, which became increasingly challenging both emotionally and physically. That's when she began to change her perspective, and that change made all the difference.
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Episode 83
Scott went to multiple specialists in search of a cure for his eye disease. He would often sit and just think about going blind. But one day a son's random comment took his mind off of everything and reconnected the family.
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Episode 82
When Elizabeth lost her vision in an auto accident, she went into survival mode. As she began to rebuild her life, she found certain connections and activities helped her focus less on her limitations and more on a renewed sense of purpose.
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Episode 81
When Eddie lost a fair amount of vision, she was scared and didn’t know how she was going to cope. But she found a source of strength and inspiration.
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Episode 80
As Kenneth lost most of his sight to glaucoma, he was feeling increasingly isolated and alone. Then he made a commitment, forcing himself to find ways to stay connected to the rest of the world.
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Episode 79
When Carol Lee was diagnosed with age-related macular degeneration, she was angry and frustrated. Over time, resentment began to fade a bit and the shock wore off. Gradually, her perspective started to shift.
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Episode 78
When Cliff unexpectedly lost a fair amount of his sight, he felt overwhelmed. But with time, he found a way forward.
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Episode 77
Thomas is experiencing many challenges of late, including vision loss. He finds inspiration and hope knowing he's not alone.
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Episode 76
Nikki has lost her vision due to a rare autoimmune disease. While she appreciates positive bits of advice and encouragement, she also stays grounded in the struggles she's facing and knows others do, too. She's feeling the loss.
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Episode 75
When a favorite hobby became more difficult for Dianne due to glaucoma, she learned to tap into something else. It turned out to be the ideal thing.
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Episode 74
Peter's sight slowly but steadily worsened over the course of several years. When he had to give up driving, his self-image took a hit. Working through his emotions has helped him cope and adjust.