"Having the courage to keep moving"
Losing a fair amount of her vision brought with it a series of other losses for Dia. She began to feel depressed and very fearful. However, she gradually started giving herself pep talks and reconnecting with the things that bring her joy.
Hadley
Having the courage to keep moving
Dia: I was fearful of walking outside. Terribly fearful. And overcoming that fear was huge and it took me quite some time to overcome it.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Dia: Hi, my name is Dia and I live in St. Charles, Illinois. I have a degenerative eye disease called Ischemic optic neuropathy, anterior, which is a medical term for optic nerve stroke. First happened in my left eye approximately six years ago, and it's amazing how the brain takes over and you're able to function with loss of vision in one eye.
And unfortunately for me, which is probably only 20% of the people that have it happen in the second eye, which was my right eye, and that is the worst of the two. I am now considered legally blind. I do have some vision, and I have approximately, they tell me 40% total vision between both eyes.
I remember back probably about three years ago, I was extremely depressed after the second eye had the optic nerve stroke, and I was in tears one evening and I kind of snapped out of it for a minute and started googling. There had to be help for people with my disease. And I googled and I googled and I took down phone numbers and I was my own advocate. And I found several agencies that I reached out to, the following day and spent the entire 24 hours on the phone getting assistance and help and having people come in and assess me for different types of help that they could provide. So, I did it. Took me a long time, took a lot of courage, but I did it. And if I can do it, anybody can do it.
I was fearful of walking outside, terribly fearful. Well, first of all, the fear of falling, that was a big one. And even walking with a cane. It was my friend, but it wasn't really a good friend. And people grabbing onto me was horrible. It was almost a violation in my mind, even though I know they meant well. But that was really difficult, and I had to learn how to teach them how not to grab onto me because that was another fear of falling.
One of the hardest things I had to do was, it took me one year to get into an Uber by myself. I was hyperventilating at times. And overcoming that fear was huge, and it took me quite some time to overcome it. It took me one year to go to my park district for a concert tour. To get into the bus with other people that were sighted. And I remember shaking, physically shaking the entire bus trip until we got to the theater.
Just pushing myself and being persistent and just, I got to do this. I got to do this. I can do this. The whole ride in the car in the Uber or the bus trip to the theater, I kept telling myself, I can do it. You can do it, you can do it. And that was it. It's almost like mind over matter.
In the past six months, I've had to give up my car. I've stopped driving. I had to quit my career for 54 years. I was a salon owner and a hairstylist, and all of that compiled on top of each other and it was a loss. Grieving and getting through it. And right now, I also have a therapist that I talk to once a week, and that helps. I strongly recommend that. Just having courage, the courage to keep moving.
There are days that I just want to sit in my chair and close my eyes and sleep, and then I have to pick myself up and start over and say, okay, you need to move. You need to get moving. You need to do something. You need to be creative. You need to talk to people and help people.
Helping others is who I have been all my life, all my career. The most important thing right now for me is I have a purpose. My purpose is helping others.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 100
As Patricia's vision changed, doing things on her own became harder, and at times she felt like no one really understood. Connecting with others going through many of the same things helped her feel less alone and more like herself again.
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Episode 99
Rebecca was used to handling things on her own, but vision loss brought anger, frustration, and challenges she hadn't expected. Over time, she found a different way forward, making room for the hard days, accepting help, and finding people who understood.
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Episode 98
As her vision changed, Martha worried her world might start getting smaller. But a trip reminded her that she didn't have to give up the things she loved. Turns out, asking for a little help can take you a long way.
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Episode 97
Vision loss doesn't always happen all at once. For Kara, it keeps changing, which means she's constantly figuring out what she can and can't do. Hear how she's learning to adjust, deal with the frustrations, and take each day as it comes.
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Episode 96
For Carolyn, connecting with people has always come naturally. When vision loss made it harder to recognize faces, she worried about missing those everyday connections. Hear how speaking up about her vision helped others understand what she needed.
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Episode 95
A close call on a walk changed the way Lance thinks about living with vision loss. It reminded him to stay open, keep learning, and keep moving forward.
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Episode 94
For Dottie, losing her vision meant giving up many things, and there was one farewell that hit especially hard. But after making a difficult choice to let go of something she loved, Dottie found a new perspective on what she had lost—and gained.
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Episode 93
Linda always imagined retirement would mean doing the volunteer work she loved, but after losing her eyesight, she thought that chapter of her life was over. Then one memorable hospital visit reminded her she still had exactly what people needed.
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Episode 92
As Mary's vision worsened, the life she'd always known began slipping out of reach. She wasn't sure where to turn or what might help. But a chance meeting changed things for her in ways she now hopes to pass on.
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Episode 91
When Susan began losing vision, she grew fearful about the future. But she found a source of hope and courage.
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Episode 90
Early in her journey with vision loss, Char was bitter and angry at the world. But one day, a heartfelt conversation helped her turn a corner and, as she put it, "look at vision loss through different eyes."
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Episode 89
The impact vision loss had on Todd's life was profound. Through cycles of anger and depression, he often took it out on those who cared most about him. Then he started channeling those emotions into a new activity, and that made all the difference for him and his family.
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