"It's not my whole life"
Listen in as Alice shares a boyfriend's advice from many years ago. Words that give her hope, even today.
Hadley
It’s Not My Whole Life
Presented by Douglas Walker
Douglas: Hello, and welcome to the Insights and Sound Bites podcast, where people facing vision loss share insights about what has helped them cope and adjust.
Voice 1: You cannot do this alone. You need people who are experiencing the same thing.
Voice 2: Probably the hardest part was just navigating through the emotions of it.
Douglas: My name is Douglas Walker. Today we’ll hear from Alice. Alice will share with us how she made the mistake of allowing her vision loss to define who she was.
Alice: Hello. My name's Alice I'm from Myanmar, formerly known as Burma. I wasn’t born as a blind person, but I lost my eyesight due to glaucoma when I was a teenager. So, for about four or five years after my vision loss, I was spiraling into two extremes self-pity and denial.
From time to time, I just hid in my own shell and I kept myself away from other people. I wallowed in self-pity and I just kept repeating the words, Why me? Why me? Why did this happen to me?
But sometimes I fell into the trap of denial. I denied the fact that I can no longer see. I tried too hard in everything to act like a sighted person. And I was too proud to ask for help from other people. So, you may guess what happened to me? I just ended up in misery.
But a miracle happened one day when I was at university. My then boyfriend said, Alice like it or not, blindness is a part of your life. But you must also understand that it's not your whole life.
It was really an aha moment for me. Like it or not, I must accept that blindness is a part of my life. I cannot remove it from my life. But it's not my whole life or it's not the end of the world.
I still have many other senses, and I still can do many other things. Maybe in different ways that worked. Blindness is a part of your life, not your whole life.
So, unfortunately, I broke up with that boyfriend, but his words still has a special place in my heart. Blindness is a part of your life, not your whole life.
Douglas: Was there something that someone said to you or something that happened along the way that made all the difference in the world in helping you adjust to living with vision loss?
We‘d love to hear from you if you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail by calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected]. Again, my name is Douglas Walker. Take care and I’ll see you next time.
All Episodes
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Episode 57
Terry's doctor told him, "There's nothing more we can do. You'll never drive again," and he was distraught. Then he recalled his military days as a Marine and sailor, and that got him through.
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Episode 56
When Emma lost her sight in just a few months, she struggled to cope. She felt alone, her insecurities grew, and self-esteem plummeted. With time, she came to a new understanding and that helped her tremendously.
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Episode 55
Dave calls his experience with vision loss a slow torture. In the face of this, however, he has found a sense of inspiration in explorers, history, and an activity you wouldn't typically connect with vision loss, sightseeing.
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Episode 54
When Albert's vision decreased to the point that he could no longer read print anymore, he found it stressful. But he's found a new source of comfort that helps him quite a bit.
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Episode 53
Jayne can feel isolated living with her eye disease, spending much of her days forcing herself to focus on things that have become blurry. The stress can be overwhelming, causing her to shut down. But there's one area of life that now brings her more joy than ever before.
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Episode 52
When Jeffry lost his sight, he felt a loss of control, a loss of dignity. Then, he began his long road to empowerment, one small goal at a time.
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Episode 51
Marilyn went through bouts of anxiety and depression with her vision loss and still grieves the loss several years into her journey. She also decided to do something for herself which has helped tremendously.
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Episode 50
Learning to live with vision loss wasn't always easy for Pam. But with time, her bad days are fewer.
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Episode 49
Jennifer didn't know what to do or who to go to for help as her vision was fading. Then, by chance, she found some help. She found some direction.
The book referenced in this episode is "Macular Degeneration: The Complete Guide to Saving and Maximizing Your Sight"
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Episode 48
When Carmel heard a Hadley podcast, it helped her understand what had been happening to her along with her vision loss—something she had nicknamed her "phantom vision."
Carmel mentions an episode of our sister podcast, Hadley Presents. Here's a link to that episode on Vision Loss and Charles Bonnet Syndrome.
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Episode 47
It was tough for Linda to give up driving and she was heartbroken when reading became difficult. She felt her world was shrinking. But then she asked for help.
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Episode 46
Ashia felt all alone in her vision loss. No one around her knew what she was going through. Then she found something that gave her hope.