"It's not just happening to me"
As Patricia's vision changed, doing things on her own became harder, and at times she felt like no one really understood. Connecting with others going through many of the same things helped her feel less alone and more like herself again.
Hadley
“It’s not just happening to me”
Patricia: I couldn't recognize people's faces. That had always been a problem. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one. I'm in this world all by myself.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Patricia: I'm Patricia Gunter. I'm in Valencia, California. I have retinitis pigmentosa, newly diagnosed with cataracts. They've gotten very thick and out of control, so I'm looking at cataract surgery.
I was told as a child growing up, from 12 on up, that I was nearsighted. That's all I ever knew. I didn't know anything about being legally blind until I became an adult. And so here now I'm looking at cataract surgery and hoping for the best.
I couldn't recognize people's faces. That had always been a problem. Even my children, my responses, just their voices is what I would listen for, but I didn't know I couldn't see. Recently, I made a move back in November, and before I moved, I noticed someone knocked on my door, I opened the door, and I didn't see anyone. And I didn't think I had lost my vision at that time, but I think it was happening then. And just even now, I just have issues even visually seeing things in front of me.
It's really scary. And it's like I'm in a tunnel. I feel like I'm closed in like claustrophobic and I'm afraid to be alone in public, to travel, because I was independently traveling on buses and dollar ride, things like that.
Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one. I'm in this world all by myself.
I think by calling Hadley being in a group with other people that are dealing with the same issues with the vision loss, just being around other people with like conditions helped me to get through my situation because hearing other people's stories, I know, "Oh, I'm not the only one." It's not just happening to me.
And know that I'm still a person in spite of my blindness and that I still have a life to live and just hearing other people's stories and how they're adjusting to the blindness and it's like, "Okay, come on now, it's okay. You still alive, you still can meet people that I can smile, I can sing, I can dance, I can do ... " Those things, I don't have to feel sad and alone anymore. I just feel very glad that I found out about the groups.
Just knowing that people care about you in spite of your blindness, that you're still a person, I heard that in the group and they have people that I talk to on the phone and they make me feel like I'm a person, that they need me, like I need them.
It just helped me.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 87
Debbie has found a place near her that helps unleash her creative streak and her desire to give back to the community, a place where how much she can see doesn't matter.
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Episode 86
Doug was filled with uncertainty after realizing that the vision he lost was unlikely to be restored. His anxiety grew as the silver bullet he hoped for never materialized. But he did find things that helped him manage and continue to live his life with purpose.
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Episode 85
When Nancy's vision deteriorated to the point that it was challenging to navigate streets of a neighborhood she walked for decades, it was humbling. But a friend's comment surprised and inspired her. Her perspective started to shift.
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Episode 84
Macular degeneration was no stranger to Valerie, her mom had the condition. Early into her own diagnosis of AMD, treatments worked well and her vision remained stable. Over time, however, she noticed more significant changes, which became increasingly challenging both emotionally and physically. That's when she began to change her perspective, and that change made all the difference.
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Episode 83
Scott went to multiple specialists in search of a cure for his eye disease. He would often sit and just think about going blind. But one day a son's random comment took his mind off of everything and reconnected the family.
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Episode 82
When Elizabeth lost her vision in an auto accident, she went into survival mode. As she began to rebuild her life, she found certain connections and activities helped her focus less on her limitations and more on a renewed sense of purpose.
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Episode 81
When Eddie lost a fair amount of vision, she was scared and didn’t know how she was going to cope. But she found a source of strength and inspiration.
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Episode 80
As Kenneth lost most of his sight to glaucoma, he was feeling increasingly isolated and alone. Then he made a commitment, forcing himself to find ways to stay connected to the rest of the world.
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Episode 79
When Carol Lee was diagnosed with age-related macular degeneration, she was angry and frustrated. Over time, resentment began to fade a bit and the shock wore off. Gradually, her perspective started to shift.
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Episode 78
When Cliff unexpectedly lost a fair amount of his sight, he felt overwhelmed. But with time, he found a way forward.
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Episode 77
Thomas is experiencing many challenges of late, including vision loss. He finds inspiration and hope knowing he's not alone.
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Episode 76
Nikki has lost her vision due to a rare autoimmune disease. While she appreciates positive bits of advice and encouragement, she also stays grounded in the struggles she's facing and knows others do, too. She's feeling the loss.
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