"It's not just happening to me"
As Patricia's vision changed, doing things on her own became harder, and at times she felt like no one really understood. Connecting with others going through many of the same things helped her feel less alone and more like herself again.
Hadley
“It’s not just happening to me”
Patricia: I couldn't recognize people's faces. That had always been a problem. Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one. I'm in this world all by myself.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Patricia: I'm Patricia Gunter. I'm in Valencia, California. I have retinitis pigmentosa, newly diagnosed with cataracts. They've gotten very thick and out of control, so I'm looking at cataract surgery.
I was told as a child growing up, from 12 on up, that I was nearsighted. That's all I ever knew. I didn't know anything about being legally blind until I became an adult. And so here now I'm looking at cataract surgery and hoping for the best.
I couldn't recognize people's faces. That had always been a problem. Even my children, my responses, just their voices is what I would listen for, but I didn't know I couldn't see. Recently, I made a move back in November, and before I moved, I noticed someone knocked on my door, I opened the door, and I didn't see anyone. And I didn't think I had lost my vision at that time, but I think it was happening then. And just even now, I just have issues even visually seeing things in front of me.
It's really scary. And it's like I'm in a tunnel. I feel like I'm closed in like claustrophobic and I'm afraid to be alone in public, to travel, because I was independently traveling on buses and dollar ride, things like that.
Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one. I'm in this world all by myself.
I think by calling Hadley being in a group with other people that are dealing with the same issues with the vision loss, just being around other people with like conditions helped me to get through my situation because hearing other people's stories, I know, "Oh, I'm not the only one." It's not just happening to me.
And know that I'm still a person in spite of my blindness and that I still have a life to live and just hearing other people's stories and how they're adjusting to the blindness and it's like, "Okay, come on now, it's okay. You still alive, you still can meet people that I can smile, I can sing, I can dance, I can do ... " Those things, I don't have to feel sad and alone anymore. I just feel very glad that I found out about the groups.
Just knowing that people care about you in spite of your blindness, that you're still a person, I heard that in the group and they have people that I talk to on the phone and they make me feel like I'm a person, that they need me, like I need them.
It just helped me.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 75
When a favorite hobby became more difficult for Dianne due to glaucoma, she learned to tap into something else. It turned out to be the ideal thing.
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Episode 74
Peter's sight slowly but steadily worsened over the course of several years. When he had to give up driving, his self-image took a hit. Working through his emotions has helped him cope and adjust.
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Episode 73
Sherry's vision loss has been gradual yet relentless. Asking for help to do things she used to be able to do on her own is a challenge for her, as it is for many. But she's finding some new tools and new ways to do things.
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Episode 72
Carolyn lost much of her vision after several glaucoma surgeries, leaving her feeling angry and discouraged. But a familiar childhood story inspired her to keep trying, even when tasks seemed impossible.
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Episode 71
Learning he would never see again was heartbreaking for Shannon. Embracing what challenged him, Shannon discovered strength in the unfamiliar.
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Episode 70
The week Jessica was diagnosed with an eye disease that would progressively impair her vision, she also found out she had cancer. A few things have helped her continue to feel strong and less isolated.
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Episode 69
Jack's vision has been declining for years. The hardest part for him is that it just keeps changing, so he needs to keep adapting. A routine Jack's wife put in place for the couple has helped him cope and adjust.
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Episode 68
Losing a fair amount of her vision brought with it a series of other losses for Dia. She began to feel depressed and very fearful. However, she gradually started giving herself pep talks and reconnecting with the things that bring her joy.
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Episode 67
Julia had always lived life on her own terms. So, when vision loss meant giving up her car keys, she used a white cane or her husband's arm to guide her steps, and kept going. Still, she noticed a change in how others treated her… until she made a decision she now calls, "the best thing I ever did."
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Episode 66
When the scenario Leighann had feared for years finally happened and glaucoma took much of her vision, it hit her hard. But her desire to keep living meant challenging herself—even when it scared her.
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Episode 65
Michael's vision loss led him down a long, uncomfortable road, discovering what he had to let go of and what he could still hold on to for his future. He continues to challenge himself to try new things.
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Episode 64
Tamisue's eyesight has diminished to the point where she feels stuck between two worlds—not enough vision to function as she once did, but not fully blind. She fears her world going completely dark. However, an addition to her life has made a tremendous difference for both her and her family.
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