Strength in Asking
Moving to New York City and becoming comfortable using a white cane helped Nisha see asking for help differently and opened the door to unexpected connections with others.
Hadley
Strength in Asking
Nisha: The white cane communicated to the world that I was visually impaired because I still have a lot of the habits of a sighted person. And without that white cane, people look at me and say she doesn't need any help.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Nisha: My name is Nisha Falcigno and I am someone who has been diagnosed with cone rod dystrophy. I was diagnosed with that about 30 years ago, and in the last 10 years it's definitely created a situation where I'm now legally blind and I use a cane and several other type tools to help me navigate living in New York City.
Unfortunately, I realized I couldn't drive anymore and I lived in suburban Connecticut, so that was a bit of an issue. I then decided that the best thing for me was to move to a more urban environment, one that I was already familiar with before my vision loss took effect. So I had a familiarity with the landscape. Once I moved to New York, there were so many more resources available to help me adjust to things.
And it's just a matter of, for instance, going into a grocery store and identifying yourself as visually impaired and asking for help in that store. And someone is kind enough to take me through the store and help me do things like shopping and all the other things you need to do when you can't really identify items on a shelf anymore.
First, I had to learn that I needed to use white cane and the white cane communicated to the world that I was visually impaired because I still have a lot of the habits of a sighted person. And without that white cane, people look at me and say she doesn't need any help. Why is she asking these questions? So, using the white cane was something I had to really get over some mental hurdles in using it because I then now communicated to the world, “okay, I have this visual impairment.”
And the beautiful thing about that is that I've had so many interactions with people who were basically strangers and it's given me that human connection that I might not have ever had had I not needed the help and asked for it. And it's given me a wonderful experience of meeting all these people that I never would've normally had the opportunity to meet.
And I realized at that point that asking for help and using the cane were really a source of courage and it wasn't a source of weakness. Once I figured that out, it changed my life.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 102
After years of living with vision loss, Bill talks about the anger and frustration he felt, how it affected his family, and what's helped him become more patient and accepting of the things he can't change.
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Episode 101
When Terry lost more of her vision, it took time to come to terms with what was happening. Talking with others who understand what she's going through has made it easier to open up and find her way forward.
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Episode 100
As Patricia's vision changed, doing things on her own became harder, and at times she felt like no one really understood. Connecting with others going through many of the same things helped her feel less alone and more like herself again.
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Episode 99
Rebecca was used to handling things on her own, but vision loss brought anger, frustration, and challenges she hadn't expected. Over time, she found a different way forward, making room for the hard days, accepting help, and finding people who understood.
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Episode 98
As her vision changed, Martha worried her world might start getting smaller. But a trip reminded her that she didn't have to give up the things she loved. Turns out, asking for a little help can take you a long way.
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Episode 97
Vision loss doesn't always happen all at once. For Kara, it keeps changing, which means she's constantly figuring out what she can and can't do. Hear how she's learning to adjust, deal with the frustrations, and take each day as it comes.
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Episode 96
For Carolyn, connecting with people has always come naturally. When vision loss made it harder to recognize faces, she worried about missing those everyday connections. Hear how speaking up about her vision helped others understand what she needed.
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Episode 95
A close call on a walk changed the way Lance thinks about living with vision loss. It reminded him to stay open, keep learning, and keep moving forward.
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Episode 94
For Dottie, losing her vision meant giving up many things, and there was one farewell that hit especially hard. But after making a difficult choice to let go of something she loved, Dottie found a new perspective on what she had lost—and gained.
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Episode 93
Linda always imagined retirement would mean doing the volunteer work she loved, but after losing her eyesight, she thought that chapter of her life was over. Then one memorable hospital visit reminded her she still had exactly what people needed.
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Episode 92
As Mary's vision worsened, the life she'd always known began slipping out of reach. She wasn't sure where to turn or what might help. But a chance meeting changed things for her in ways she now hopes to pass on.
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Episode 91
When Susan began losing vision, she grew fearful about the future. But she found a source of hope and courage.
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