Strength in Asking
Moving to New York City and becoming comfortable using a white cane helped Nisha see asking for help differently and opened the door to unexpected connections with others.
Hadley
Strength in Asking
Nisha: The white cane communicated to the world that I was visually impaired because I still have a lot of the habits of a sighted person. And without that white cane, people look at me and say she doesn't need any help.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Nisha: My name is Nisha Falcigno and I am someone who has been diagnosed with cone rod dystrophy. I was diagnosed with that about 30 years ago, and in the last 10 years it's definitely created a situation where I'm now legally blind and I use a cane and several other type tools to help me navigate living in New York City.
Unfortunately, I realized I couldn't drive anymore and I lived in suburban Connecticut, so that was a bit of an issue. I then decided that the best thing for me was to move to a more urban environment, one that I was already familiar with before my vision loss took effect. So I had a familiarity with the landscape. Once I moved to New York, there were so many more resources available to help me adjust to things.
And it's just a matter of, for instance, going into a grocery store and identifying yourself as visually impaired and asking for help in that store. And someone is kind enough to take me through the store and help me do things like shopping and all the other things you need to do when you can't really identify items on a shelf anymore.
First, I had to learn that I needed to use white cane and the white cane communicated to the world that I was visually impaired because I still have a lot of the habits of a sighted person. And without that white cane, people look at me and say she doesn't need any help. Why is she asking these questions? So, using the white cane was something I had to really get over some mental hurdles in using it because I then now communicated to the world, “okay, I have this visual impairment.”
And the beautiful thing about that is that I've had so many interactions with people who were basically strangers and it's given me that human connection that I might not have ever had had I not needed the help and asked for it. And it's given me a wonderful experience of meeting all these people that I never would've normally had the opportunity to meet.
And I realized at that point that asking for help and using the cane were really a source of courage and it wasn't a source of weakness. Once I figured that out, it changed my life.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 90
Early in her journey with vision loss, Char was bitter and angry at the world. But one day, a heartfelt conversation helped her turn a corner and, as she put it, "look at vision loss through different eyes."
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Episode 89
The impact vision loss had on Todd's life was profound. Through cycles of anger and depression, he often took it out on those who cared most about him. Then he started channeling those emotions into a new activity, and that made all the difference for him and his family.
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Episode 88
When Pat was diagnosed with an inherited retinal disease, her doctor told her she wouldn't go completely blind, but her life would change forever. And while it's been a hard road, she's found some things along the way that help.
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Episode 87
Debbie has found a place near her that helps unleash her creative streak and her desire to give back to the community, a place where how much she can see doesn't matter.
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Episode 86
Doug was filled with uncertainty after realizing that the vision he lost was unlikely to be restored. His anxiety grew as the silver bullet he hoped for never materialized. But he did find things that helped him manage and continue to live his life with purpose.
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Episode 85
When Nancy's vision deteriorated to the point that it was challenging to navigate streets of a neighborhood she walked for decades, it was humbling. But a friend's comment surprised and inspired her. Her perspective started to shift.
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Episode 84
Macular degeneration was no stranger to Valerie, her mom had the condition. Early into her own diagnosis of AMD, treatments worked well and her vision remained stable. Over time, however, she noticed more significant changes, which became increasingly challenging both emotionally and physically. That's when she began to change her perspective, and that change made all the difference.
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Episode 83
Scott went to multiple specialists in search of a cure for his eye disease. He would often sit and just think about going blind. But one day a son's random comment took his mind off of everything and reconnected the family.
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Episode 82
When Elizabeth lost her vision in an auto accident, she went into survival mode. As she began to rebuild her life, she found certain connections and activities helped her focus less on her limitations and more on a renewed sense of purpose.
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Episode 81
When Eddie lost a fair amount of vision, she was scared and didn’t know how she was going to cope. But she found a source of strength and inspiration.
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Episode 80
As Kenneth lost most of his sight to glaucoma, he was feeling increasingly isolated and alone. Then he made a commitment, forcing himself to find ways to stay connected to the rest of the world.
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Episode 79
When Carol Lee was diagnosed with age-related macular degeneration, she was angry and frustrated. Over time, resentment began to fade a bit and the shock wore off. Gradually, her perspective started to shift.
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