"I've lost...but I've gained"
For many, having to give up the car keys due to vision loss is traumatic. Deb felt it too. Then, during a call to arrange transportation for herself, a new door opened.
Hadley
I’ve Lost…but I’ve Gained
Presented by Douglas Walker
Douglas: Hello, and welcome to the Insights and Sound Bites podcast, where people facing vision loss share insights about what has helped them cope and adjust.
Deb Reed: I consider myself an introvert. And I never ever expected myself to be in this position.
Douglas: My name is Douglas Walker. Today we’ll hear from Deb. Deb shares with us how losing her ability to drive was actually the beginning of a whole new journey.
Deb Reed: This is Deborah Reed. My friends call me Deb, and I'm from Bristol, Connecticut.
I cried on the way home from the doctor's office. I had driven myself there, so I had to get myself back. And I cried because I had a job that was almost like a ministry. I was a homemaker companion for disabled seniors. And so, my car was key to the work I did. I was taking them to appointments, taking them shopping, cleaning, cooking for them. And you become like family with people like that. And that was something I had to give up. I definitely wasn't in it for the money. But yeah, I was very sad to have to close that chapter.
My husband was still working at the time and I thought, how am I going to get anywhere? And so, I found out from the state that there's a paratransit service in our town because we have the public bus route. And when I called that number, the woman who answered, who helped with the certification, was actually, recently in a motorcycle accident with her husband, about a year before. And they were both injured pretty bad. They were broadsided by a truck. And he lost his sight was one of the results. And so, she had been through all the things that she knew I was going to have to go through, and it was just an amazing wealth of information that she was able to share with me. And then she told me about a National Federation of the Blind support group that met at the library. And so, I started to go to that.
But I will say that here we are over 10 years later, and I am now heading up this chapter meeting that I attended at the beginning of the journey. And I consider myself an introvert, and I never, ever expected to be in this position. And I've learned so much and grown so much just by belonging to this organization. So even though I have so many losses because of my vision deteriorating, I've gained a lot.
Douglas: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share, you can leave me a voicemail by calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can email me a recording to [email protected]. Again, my name is Douglas Walker. Take care and I’ll see you next time.
All Episodes
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Episode 57
Terry's doctor told him, "There's nothing more we can do. You'll never drive again," and he was distraught. Then he recalled his military days as a Marine and sailor, and that got him through.
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Episode 56
When Emma lost her sight in just a few months, she struggled to cope. She felt alone, her insecurities grew, and self-esteem plummeted. With time, she came to a new understanding and that helped her tremendously.
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Episode 55
Dave calls his experience with vision loss a slow torture. In the face of this, however, he has found a sense of inspiration in explorers, history, and an activity you wouldn't typically connect with vision loss, sightseeing.
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Episode 54
When Albert's vision decreased to the point that he could no longer read print anymore, he found it stressful. But he's found a new source of comfort that helps him quite a bit.
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Episode 53
Jayne can feel isolated living with her eye disease, spending much of her days forcing herself to focus on things that have become blurry. The stress can be overwhelming, causing her to shut down. But there's one area of life that now brings her more joy than ever before.
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Episode 52
When Jeffry lost his sight, he felt a loss of control, a loss of dignity. Then, he began his long road to empowerment, one small goal at a time.
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Episode 51
Marilyn went through bouts of anxiety and depression with her vision loss and still grieves the loss several years into her journey. She also decided to do something for herself which has helped tremendously.
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Episode 50
Learning to live with vision loss wasn't always easy for Pam. But with time, her bad days are fewer.
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Episode 49
Jennifer didn't know what to do or who to go to for help as her vision was fading. Then, by chance, she found some help. She found some direction.
The book referenced in this episode is "Macular Degeneration: The Complete Guide to Saving and Maximizing Your Sight"
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Episode 48
When Carmel heard a Hadley podcast, it helped her understand what had been happening to her along with her vision loss—something she had nicknamed her "phantom vision."
Carmel mentions an episode of our sister podcast, Hadley Presents. Here's a link to that episode on Vision Loss and Charles Bonnet Syndrome.
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Episode 47
It was tough for Linda to give up driving and she was heartbroken when reading became difficult. She felt her world was shrinking. But then she asked for help.
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Episode 46
Ashia felt all alone in her vision loss. No one around her knew what she was going through. Then she found something that gave her hope.