"That was the turning point for me"
Listen in as Ruth shares how her frustration and impatience turned around with just one phone call.
Hadley
That was the turning point for me
Ruth: I was listening to Doug's Adjusting to Vision Loss, and he was saying, "You know, it just takes time. Be a little patient." Well, that's not me.
Marc: This is Hadley’s Insights and Sound Bites, where people facing vision loss share what has helped them cope and adjust.
Ruth Alhilali: My name is Ruth Alhilali. I live in Farmer's Branch, which is a suburb of Dallas, Texas. I developed glaucoma last year, my glaucoma came on suddenly. I was at a doctor's appointment, had a good exam in March of last year, and then in April my pressure was high and I'd already lost quite a bit of vision. So, it's all in my left eye, which was the eye I was using most of the time. I have a lazy right eye, which has now been forced to do some work.
The first thing that I guess it was both emotional and visual is trying to find things, trying to put them in one place and then not seeing them. And I just wasn't seeing, even though it was there and I was looking at it, I wasn't seeing. And that took me a while to get used to. But the worst is just the emotional, not being able to read, and not being able to do all the volunteer activities that I filled my time up with, because they either involve driving, and while I can drive, I've limited my driving a lot or if it's where you're packing something or moving around in a kitchen with limited peripheral vision, I sort of felt I was a danger, that I would bump into somebody. So, it was just losing all the things that I had filled my retirement up with.
Somehow, I discovered Hadley and I was listening to Doug's Adjusting to Vision Loss, and he was saying, "You know, it just takes time. Be a little patient." Well, that's not me. And so after listening to that, I was feeling a little unhappy about what I heard, so I wrote a comment that was on the negative side I guess, and showed how frustrated I felt. And low and behold, Debbie Worman called me back. I never thought anybody would ever read my comment, and that was just fantastic. We later on had a long conversation and just to know that there was somebody else on the other end and who was there in the position to show me where things were and to tell me "Try this," or "try that, it will work out."
I think that was the turning point for me.
Marc: You never know who might need to hear your story. If you’d like to share with us, just leave us a message on our Insights & Sound Bites voicemail. By calling, 847-512-4867. Or, you can use your smartphone or computer and email us a recording to [email protected].
All Episodes
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Episode 63
The loss Tom feels regarding his vision is complicated because it is ongoing. Acceptance has not come easy. Through the years, though, he has come to approach life a bit differently.
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Episode 62
Anne's declining vision had her feeling down and sorry for herself. But two gifts—one she gave and one she received—helped turn things around for her.
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Episode 61
Glaucoma advanced to the point where Ron found it too difficult to do the volunteer work he loved in retirement. Still, he found a way to pull himself out of the hole he felt he was in and continue to give back.
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Episode 60
Diabetic retinopathy has taken more and more of Charles's vision. To cope, he is learning new approaches to life AND leaning into areas of passion that don't rely on sight.
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Episode 59
Bruce's vision had been decreasing for years. When it reached the point where he was tripping over objects and bumping into people, he felt embarrassed and kept his vision loss a secret. His wife convinced him to try something new.
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Episode 58
Marie grieved the loss of her vision, and still does. Yet, on a sunny August morning, she came to a realization that made all the difference in the world.
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Episode 57
Terry's doctor told him, "There's nothing more we can do. You'll never drive again," and he was distraught. Then he recalled his military days as a Marine and sailor, and that got him through.
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Episode 56
When Emma lost her sight in just a few months, she struggled to cope. She felt alone, her insecurities grew, and self-esteem plummeted. With time, she came to a new understanding and that helped her tremendously.
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Episode 55
Dave calls his experience with vision loss a slow torture. In the face of this, however, he has found a sense of inspiration in explorers, history, and an activity you wouldn't typically connect with vision loss, sightseeing.
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Episode 54
When Albert's vision decreased to the point that he could no longer read print anymore, he found it stressful. But he's found a new source of comfort that helps him quite a bit.
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Episode 53
Jayne can feel isolated living with her eye disease, spending much of her days forcing herself to focus on things that have become blurry. The stress can be overwhelming, causing her to shut down. But there's one area of life that now brings her more joy than ever before.
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Episode 52
When Jeffry lost his sight, he felt a loss of control, a loss of dignity. Then, he began his long road to empowerment, one small goal at a time.